Halloween is almost upon us! You’ve only got three weeks to come up with the most incredible costume anyone has laid eyes on.
At the same time, you don’t want to show up in the same outfit as someone else. Below, we clock ten costumes you’re sure to see at every party.
Netflix and Chill
This costume is so very right now. Plus it’s versatile: Netflix and Chill can go solo, or easily translate into a couples’ costume with your very best f**k buddy. (If you’re thrifty, one of you can reuse last year’s Ice Bucket Challenge look.) You’re also guaranteed someone to go home and “watch scary movies with” after the festivities. Everyone’s a winner!
It’s not okay to make fun of the way a woman looks— unless that woman is a bigot who uses the name of God to deny people their civil rights. Then, you know… whatever. You’ll need a long shake-and-go wig (UNSTYLED, clipped back), drab and oversized attire (layered), and a general sense of self-righteousness. Bonus points if you can get a pic with someone dressed as the pope.
Franny—sorry, Pope Francis—was bigger than Beyonce this month, when he launched his debut U.S. tour. For added satire, wear flip-flops (y’know for all the times he flip-flops on treating LGBT people with respect.) And, like we said, just find someone dressed as Kim Davis (or a Boy Scout) and the Instagrams practically take themselves.
Don’t shoot the messenger. We’re not saying you should dress as Caitlyn, but some of you probably will, and she herself says it’s okay. So have at it. A word of warning, though: do her justice (like Sharon Needles, above) or prepare to engage in a lengthy and heated social justice debate that will ruin the party. If someone asks why you’re dressed as Caitlyn, say she’s your hero and move on. There’s enough bickering about this on the internet, you don’t need it IRL.
Leave it to the New York City Subway System to create a star suited for both tricks and treats just in time for this high holy holiday. PIZZA RAT! He’s equal parts adorable and disgusting! All you’ll need a gray sweat suit, a rat nose, and a slice of pizza. Scratch that. If you’re anything like us, all you’ll need is a rat nose. The pizza and sweats are already our lifestyle.
OMG, remember THE DRESS? It was the internet sensation that divided the nation. The most fun part of wearing this costume will be turning to either side and convincing drunk people that it magically changed colors before their eyes. Gentlemen, do not shy away from this look. Gender is fluid an 2015, and it will only add another topical layer to your costume.
Owen from Jurassic World
This is a costume for dudes who aren’t really into dressing up. It’s great for someone who at once doesn’t want to be a total party pooper, but still wants to get laid at the end of the night. Do bring a dinosaur toy with you everywhere you go or you’re just wearing a button down and a cargo vest. Also, run from stuff. If you see someone dressed as a dinosaur, it is also your duty to calmly extend your arm and sooth the savage, prehistoric, beast.
Yaaaaaas, Queen! Slay! If you want to be Empire’s HBIC, you will need two things: Faux fur and a jaunty hat. If someone isn’t sure of what you’re supposed to be, call them Boo Boo Kitty and scream “Lucious!” into the distance and walk away yelling, “This is my company! I built this company,” as though you are about to bust into a board meeting and lay the smackdown.
Last Man On Earth
Got a beard? You’ve got a costume. Just grab whatever out of the laundry and throw it on. If you stink, say your look is “method.” If you really want to go all out for this, you’ll need two pools. One to fill with booze and lay in/drink from, and one to poop in. You may not hook up with anybody in this costume, but you will surely make an impression.
All hair, don’t care. Sia is great costume for anyone that wants to maintain a little bit of mystery. Don’t just buy a white, Party City wig and call it a day though, buy fifteen. Sew them together and tease. Ensure full facial coverage by wearing it back to front. And if you really want to do Sia properly, get a shorter friend to agree to wear a nude body suit and dance in front of you all night. Happy haunting!