Here’s a secret: Twitter is great. It puts you in constant contact with people who deserve (and sometimes earn) attention for being insightful, funny, and even sincere when the occasion calls for it.
I’m sick of “Best Of” Twitter lists featuring celebrities who aren’t even that funny, so here are 15 gays of varying fame degrees who are routinely hilarious, rarely unlovable, and always out.
1. Bradley Stern takes a break from blogging pop music to help you survive this horrible holiday.
April 1. Trust no one. (Trust no one on the other 364 days, either.)
— Bradley Stern (@MuuMuse) April 1, 2013
2. Solomon Georgio understands the bottom-line truth of marriage equality.
I deserve the right to give my husband mediocre blow jobs only on his birthday like everybody else! #MarriageEquality
— Solomon Georgio (@solomongeorgio) March 26, 2013
3. Nick Stadler: arguably the most reliable Twitter tweeter.
America. Where assault weapons will protect your family, but two dudes getting married will destroy your family.
— Nick Stadler (@Nickadoo) March 27, 2013
4. Justin Martindale hits Seacrest right where it hurts (nowhere, since he is without feelings).
Ryan Seacrest and Julianne Hough have broken up due to Erectoncilable differences.
— Justin Martindale (@justmartindale) March 16, 2013
5. Sean Brewster brings us all back to our roots.
hey lets never forget how great straight people are too.
— Sean Brewster (@TheSeanBrewster) March 27, 2013
6. Chris Schleicher is fighting and riding for equality.
I prefer to call it “reverse cowperson.”
— Chris Schleicher (@cschleichsrun) March 29, 2013
7. Peter Taggart has the latest scoop on those Biblical bedfellows.
It’s Adam and Patrick, not Adam and Steve. Adam and Steve broke up aaages ago.
— Peter Taggart (@petertaggart) March 27, 2013
8. Carey O’Donnell writes the Anna Karenina tagline we’ve been craving.
Keira Knightley: Mouth Slightly Agape Since 1845
— Carey O’Donnell (@ecareyo) March 9, 2013
9. John Early’s Laura Dern withdrawal is getting grim.
Hey @hbo! was about to be devastated about Enlightened, but then remembered all that you gave me as a gay boy from TN with Entourage!
— John Early (@bejohnce) March 20, 2013
10. Joe Dosch’s version of insulin shots scares me.
Coconut water tastes like a diabetic’s urine.
— Joe Dosch (@joedosch) March 27, 2013
11. Dave Holmes blesses Pope Francis with the truth.
Welcome, Francis I! We American Catholics look forward to following your orders (unless they’re about sex or forgiveness).
— Dave Holmes (@DaveHolmes) March 13, 2013
12. Drew Droege’s feelings (and the landslide) have got him down.
Thursday morning: just listening to Stevie Nicks & washing my wig. If this were in a movie, I’d be furious.
— Drew Droege (@drewdroege) March 14, 2013
13. Guy Branum supports the entrepreneurial efforts of WeHo’s finest.
Super annoyed that only most of the guys I’m attracted to in West Hollywood have porn or solo videos I can watch. How to handle the rest?!?
— Guy Branum (@guybranum) March 31, 2013
14. James Adomian helps us remember that “Supreme Court” is short for “Supervillain Colosseum.”
Today I’m reeeeaaaally hoping those nine robed weirdos inside their marble temple decide that I’m equal.
— James Adomian (@JAdomian) March 26, 2013
15. Sam Lansky chills and spritzes us all.
Someone please tell me why almost all fragrance counter department store gays look like serial killers
— Sam Lansky (@samlansky) March 30, 2013
Which gays are you following? Embed them below!