“American Idol”: No, seriously – this really IS a singing contest. We swear!

Paula Abdul’s Beat It, Britney! tour, sponsored by Boniva! (All photos: GETTY)

Last night’s American Idol elimination show proved once and for all that it is the country’s premier vocal competition by featuring a centerpiece performance that was lip-synced and (SPOILER!) sending home one of the season’s strongest singers in favor of the contestant who laid the biggest egg in the history of the Idol finals.

"Holy shit, did I actually just get away with that?!"

Nope, nothing wrong here!

Yeah, I’m a little sore that Allison went home last night, but she’ll be fine. More than anything I’m just not looking forward to having to listen to more of Sally Jessie Gokey’s Blues Traveler Lite routines and Kris Allen’s JJ Casuals: Shoes That Look Like Feet arrangements, but whatever. And come on, didn’t you want to go home with Allison next week and see more of her parents? HOT!

Anyway, way back in the beginning of the live performances I predicted that Adam, Gokey and Allison would be the final three, and I wasn’t that far off. At least Allison still has that Valtrex pitchwoman gig just waiting for her:


Unless Kris beats her to it!


So who else is excited to go home with Adam? I bet he lives in a spaceship! 

In 2003, Brian launched the world's first website devoted to horror film from a gay perspective (CampBlood.org), mining an untapped (and occasionally unintentional) source of entertainment and bringing together a huge and colorful population of gay horror fans and filmmakers. When he's not pulling skeletons out of closets, Brian writes reviews for horror megasite Bloody-Disgusting.com, general film site Freezedriedmovies.com, and can be found on the ever-informative RottenTomatoes.com. Brian is also a filmmaker, having produced, written, and directed two shorts (the dark romantic comedy An Apple a Day and the eerie suspense piece Two Story House) that have played at film festivals worldwide and left audiences generally uneasy. A born-and-bred Midwesterner, Brian studied Mass Media and Film at the Catholic University of America in Washington, D.C. (I know – crazy, right?) before fleeing the district for the warm and occasionally stinky shores of NYC. Brian is a proud member of the Online Film Critics Society, loving husband to illustrator Andy Swist, and benevolent overlord of their two cats.