Billy Eichner voices my exact problem with Despicable Me: the despicableness.
The minions in Despicable Me all look like pedophiles but you guys go and enjoy!
— billy eichner (@billyeichner) July 8, 2013
Chris Kelly’s listserv is serving him.
I can’t help but feel like OKCupid’s birthday email to me is a read. I’M 33 AND SINGLE I GET IT. — Chris J. Kelly (@heychrisk) July 6, 2013
Guy Branum’s Robin Wright joke is longer than Robin Wright’s appearance in Moneyball.
Sam Lansky might not be joking.
Congratulations to Amanda Bynes, a new political correspondent for Fox News
— Sam Lansky (@samlansky) July 8, 2013
Louis Virtel (holllerrrr) interrupts this list of 10 to prove he knows TheBacklot readership pretty well.
“Teen Wolf” is for people who think, “I wish Evanescence videos went on for years.”
— Louis Virtel (@louisvirtel) July 9, 2013
Chris Schleicher, like me, is always re-thinking that nomination for She-Devil.
To Meryl Streep, Golden Globe nominations are like those annoying Chinese takeout door hanger ads. — Chris Schleicher (@cschleichsrun) July 7, 2013
Louis Peitzman says a thing I like about that guy I hate.
It’s OK to like Ender’s Game again, guys. Outspoken homophobe Orson Scott Card thinks his outspoken homophobia is NBD. — Louis Peitzman (@LouisPeitzman) July 9, 2013
Dan D’Addario’s tweet needs to be moderated by Kurt Loder.
whenever ESPN magazine’s “Body Issue” comes out I think of the Madonna quote about Courtney Love being “in dire need of attention right now”
— Dan D’Addario (@DPD_) July 9, 2013
Adam Roberts flew his Lear jet to Nova Scotia to slay us.
Carly Simon: “I had some dreams…there were clouds in my coffee..clouds in my coffee.” Barista: “Um, that’s cool man…so one shot or two?”
— Adam Roberts (@amateurgourmet) July 8, 2013
Bradley Stern has needs! I mean, doesn’t have needs!
It’s not so much I need a boyfriend as much as I need someone who will watch Love & Hip-Hop with me literally all the time.
— Bradley Stern (@MuuMuse) July 9, 2013
Richard Lawson scintillates with the second Robin Wright-related tweet of the night.
Let’s never forget when Forrest Gump solved all of Boomer history.
— Richard Lawson (@rilaws) July 8, 2013