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Disney Prince Dick Pics: The Bare Necessities

disney prince dick pics gaston

We're as guilty as anyone of poring over Disney character makeovers—Disney characters with beards, Disney princes as drag queens, Disney princesses as the cast of Orange is the New Black—but Jezebel has gone where no site has gone before when they commissioned illustrator Tara Jacoby to draw a series of x-rated Disney Prince dick pics.

We can only show you a few censored examples here, but you can find all the Disney dudes—with their royal scepters exposed—here.


Gaston "likes to take nude selfies. He has a small dick—very tiny—pube-less and uncut."

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Prince Charming: "Obviously, the perfect guy has the perfect dick: like eight or nine inches, thick—but not too thick otherwise it's painful—rock hard with a nice throbbing vein. He's groomed perfectly in a way that's considerate of lovers without being too gay porn-y about it."

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Kristoff  "has blond pubes and big, full, round, firm balls. His dick is on the shorter side, but really super thick—like a Coke can—even when flaccid. He hangs out with the trolls when he's nude."

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Prince Naveen "has a very long dick that's uncut. His pubes are curly and friendly. He's wearing only a mardi gras mask."

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