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Forget Your Plans To Get Naked At Fire Island This Summer

Not allowed! (Getty Images)

Warning: The desirable general tone and musculature pictured above is not in any way typical of nude sunbathers at Fire Island. (Getty Images)

Hoping to let everthing hang out at the Pines this Summer? Forget it! The crackdown on all-over sunburns and floppy vollyball is underway. Fire Island National Seashore authorities announced plans to enforce long-standing laws against sunbathing in the nude.

Fire Island chief ranger Lena Koschmann explains that the surging popularity of Lighthouse Beach in particular has led to increased complaints and observations of “assault, sex, masturbation, prostitution” and bears, oh my!

Lighthouse Beach is New York’s most popular beach for the nudie set, though naturalists also find solace at the eastern end of Jacob Riis Park in Queens.

Koschmann says the decision is final and will be enforced. Violators of the law—a class B misdemeanor—face up to 6 months in jail and $5,000 in fines.