"No, thank you.  I'm sorry, I just don't have a minute for Jesus today.  No, thanks.  Yes, thank you for the free book, really.  I'm really in the middle of something right now.  No, you seem very nice.  Thank you!  Good luck with your...stuff!"  is usually what I end up clumsily saying to the kindly evangelists who ring my doorbell.

But this guy, he's got his speech down!

"I have a husband.  I'm gay," he says politely.  And quickly those pesky (but kind of adorable?) missionaries sashay away.

h/t: Gawker