VH1’s Hit The Floor returned for Season Three last week, reigniting the complicated relationship of gay sports agent Jude and “don’t label me” basketball star Zero.
Their on again/off-again switch was set to the “off” position, with Jude insisting on a public relationship, while Zero wanted the good stuff without the responsibilities.
Will the arrival of Jonathan Bennett provide another roadblock?
New team owner Lionel is in a panic. She has to re-sign star player Derek within the next two days or the team will lose him, so she meets with Derek’s barracuda agent Lucas (Jonathan) and brings along Jude, who she’s promoted to Executive Vice President.
Jude is all business, protesting some of the more outrageous perks in the contract, and is mercilessly teased by Lucas, who snarks “From a junior agent for us to a power player for The Devils. Wasn’t it just a year ago he was screwing up our coffee orders?”
Lionel doesn’t have time for this foolishness, and reminds Lucas she needs Derek’s deal hammered out by tomorrow. Lucas lustfully gazes at Jude and answers “Well then, let’s get to hammering.”
Meanwhile, Jude is adorably clueless.
Lionel, who’s been around the block a few times, can read the million-watt signal, and drags Jude into the hallway for a hilarious conversation about, well, doing what’s best for the company.
Lionel: “Lucas is flirting with you.”
Jude: “What? I don’t think so.”
Lionel: “I don’t have time to stand here and talk you through your feelings about this. He wants you. I want Derek.”
Jude: “What are you saying?”
Lionel: “I’m saying get back in there, hike up your skirt, and give that guy what he wants. Buy him drinks, charm him. You take it from there.”
Jude: “I don’t charm people. I’m not a charmer. This is ridiculous.”
Lionel: “This is Derek Roman’s deal! Now you put on your big girl panties and figure it out!”
Jude takes Lionel’s advice and meets with Lucas to “hammer” out the details, but has a lot to learn about the seduction game, as he awkwardly fumbles his attempt at a pass.
When Lucas insists that Derek needs a private chef, Jude agrees, and then sputters “I wish we could have a private chef right now. So we could have dinner together privately. I mean, in private.”
Oh, the carnage.
Lucas asks “are you coming on to me?” and Jude gets flustered, telling him that it was all Lionel’s idea, and she told him Lucas was flirting with him, but he didn’t believe it.
Lucas responds “and she sent you here to seduce me to get a better deal for Derek?” Jude is tongue-tied, and Lucas finally lets him off the hook, chuckling “Go Lionel.”
Jude is confused, and Lucas explains “I always had my eye on you at the office, I just never knew you were gay.” Jude is relieved, and tells him he’s still new to being out of the closet, and Lucas says “lucky me.”
They get back to business (after Lucas insists that one of the contract points has to include taking Jude out on a date), and then things take a turn.
That opens the floodgates for Jude to harp endlessly about his broken relationship, and it quickly dawns on Lucas that Jude is still obsessed with this mystery ex. He asks “was he your first?” and when Jude responds “first and only,” the expression on Lucas’ face says it all.
Jude admits that he hasn’t been with anyone else since the breakup, and caps off this date-from-hell with “this guy was everything to me. I was in love with him before I even knew what love was. When something blinds you like that it takes a while for your eyes to adjust again. Til you can see anything else.”
Their boner-killing conversation is interrupted by a call from Zero. Jude begs “don’t let Zero sabotage another date,” but Lucas tells him “Zero didn’t sabotage anything, Jude. You did. You’re still clearly hung up on this other guy, whoever he is.”
So there are a lot of intriguing and possibly juicy developments now that Lucas is in the picture. Zero has been made team captain, which will only complicate things further, as his ego will reach Trump proportions in record time.
But how long will Zero be able to stand seeing Lucas and Jude together before he explodes? Can Jude move on? And when will Lucas realize that the mystery ex has been that close to him all this time?
Most importantly, when will we get more ass shots?
Hit The Floor airs on Monday nights at 10 PM ET on VH1