“Hit The Floor” Season Finale Recap: “Payback’s A Bitch, Bitch”

Can Zude survive the finale carnage?

Previously on Hit The Floor, basketball player Zero came closer to finding his long-lost sister, with support from boyfriend Jude, who has to deal with his scumbag father Oscar being released from prison.

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Jude is stunned when Oscar tells him he’s not fired from his EVP position with the team, but he has three months to prove he can be trusted.

Zero is surprised that Jude agreed to stick around, but Jude explains that someone needs to be there to protect Lionel from Oscar’s wrath, and sooner or later Oscar is going to self-destruct, and when that happens, he wants to be there to take over.

This Jude is a far cry from the timid, milquetoast nebbish we were first introduced to, and his confidence is intoxicating. Just ask Zero.

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Meanwhile, Zero has news of his own. The private detective he hired to find his sister has come through, and has tracked her down to a family on the east coast.

He’s eager to see for himself, until he’s accosted by a rude reporter in the locker room (played by the out show creator James LaRosa), who tells him he knows he’s contacted a P.I., and wants to know what the scoop is. “Is there trouble in paradise with you and Jude?”

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Zero insists there’s no story to follow, but the thought of the news media hounding him about this definitely spooks him. He comes home to Jude and tells him he’s decided against meeting his sister. He found out she enrolled in college and is happy with her new family.

He explains “She’s doing great. And I can’t risk that. She had a horrible life, and I don’t want her to have to relive that. Reporters up my ass, and who know what they’d dig up on her. I just have to leave well enough alone.”

Jude sits down next to him, and Zero tells him “Besides, I realized I already have a family. You.” He pulls out a key, and explains that it’s from the house he grew up in, the same one they trashed a few episodes ago. “I bought it. I put it in both our names. I figured we could renovate it and make that neighborhood the new place to be. If you want.”

Jude says “Of course I want, stupid,” and the two share a sweet kiss. Nothing turns on a gay couple more than the thought of gentrification!

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Their bliss is short-lived, thanks to the machinations of Hurricane Jelena. Through a series of deceptions and well-played schemes, she has now become majority owner of the team, and the first order of business is to “take out the trash,” i.e. trade Zero!

He protests, but she tells him “Payback’s a bitch, bitch!,” and storms off, leaving him dumbfounded. Jude asks what happened, and Zero tells him that he’s been traded, and Oscar has been kicked to the gutter. Jude realizes “That means I’ve been kicked to the gutter,” but Zero tries to reassure him.

Zero: “We’ll find a better house, wherever we want to go. You’ll run that town.”

Jude: “I can’t go anywhere. Lionel. Without the team, Oscar won’t have anything else to focus on but her. I can’t leave her here to him.”

Zero: “Well, If I have to go and you have to stay, where does that leave us?”

Then this happens.

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So that’s it for Zude this season. As with all good soaps, everything is up in the air, with Jelena having made mortal enemies of every character on the show, leading to an unseen entity gunning her down in the last scene (sadly, her initials are J.H., not J.R., which would have been a hoot).

Still, Jude and Zero did go from an occasional closeted fling to the most stable relationship on the show, so hopefully that will continue when the show comes back for Season Four (which hopefully won’t take another year and a half).

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