It’s a Pale Bird! It’s a Plane! No, It’s Just Some Santorum

Spotted by an Atlantis Cruise...

It was a busy weekend for the Santorum campaign in Puerto Rico… and perhaps most shocking (or, come to think of it, not at all) is that the biggest news came courtesy of some travelers on an Atlantis cruise. Yes, between tea dances on board and beachgoing on the shore, the intrepid cruisers snapped a photo of a pale-yet-proud Rick Santorum sunning poolside on the island, which was then sent to Joe.My.Blog on Friday. After that, who could remember Rick’s announcement that Puerto Rico must adopt English as a primary language and that the island is a “Spanish speaking country?” (Oh right – 92% of the voters).

To his credit, Vanilla Rick ‘fessed up to the photo and handled it with some grace, saying, “I know, I probably should lose about 15, 20 pounds, but I’m working on it… I apologize to all of us, because I’m sure it’s not a pretty sight.”

P90X Abs Go Republican

On the one hand, it’s sort of fitting that male politicians are being held to the ridiculous celebrity body standards that seem expected from our female pols (Hillary; Sarah Palin; every other girl who’s run for anything since 5th grade class treasurer). And it can be enjoyable to watch, from our Washingtonian coverguy president to barely-30 Republican congressman Aaron Schock, whose P90X abs and protest-too-much attitude have him dodging gay rumors like they’re packed with carbs (they’re not).

But at the same time… isn’t it kind of ridiculous to expect someone to go to Puerto Rico and not get some sun? When it comes to a paradise like PR, we support everyone’s right to enjoy some rays. Whether you’re in a gorgeous place for work or vacation, make the most of it; everyone has the right to chill at the beach or the pool. What we don’t support is anti-equality, anti-gay family, anti-human rights attitudes. We hope you enjoyed your pool time, Rick… because in a few months (weeks? days?), we’ll never have to look at or hear from you again.

And Rep. Schock, if you ever decide to make any big announcements, we think you’re pretty much ready for your close-up in an Atlantis Cruises ad.