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Langford On Soaps: Derrick Returns To "Days," Will Trouble Follow?

Plus, Harry takes a huge risk to stay closeted on Hollyoaks

Langford’s Picks and Pans

Days of Our Lives (U.S.)

I don’t know which is worse, being boring or being stupid. Unfortunately, Days has decided to be both. The Will/Paul/Sonny triangle, which has kept this show watchable for months, is finally as awful as the rest of the ‘drama’ in Salem and I’m at the point where I dread having to watch. Last week was a perfect example of why.

The setup that left Paul watching Ari was just ridiculous. Ari’s babysitter couldn’t get through on Sonny’s phone, so why didn’t she call Club TBD? It’s a place of business. Surely their phones are working. And Ari is related to half of the town. The babysitter doesn’t have any of their phone numbers to call in case of an emergency? But it got worse once Will showed up and he and Paul got into it.

Will deserved a punch in the face a long time ago, but what was truly hard to believe was Sonny’s reaction. He actually bought that Paul was so jealous that he punched Will! After all the lies and schemes that Will has pulled, Sonny suddenly believes everything Will says about Paul, things that go against all Sonny knows about Paul? And that’s enough to convince Sonny to have sex with Will after they’ve barely discussed their issues and haven’t had so much as one therapy session? It’s like Sonny forgot the past few weeks, or even months, ever even happened. It’s bad writing and poor characterization.

It didn’t get much better later on when Sonny finds out that Will lied to him (again) and Sonny’s reaction is to start listing the ‘tough times’ Will has gone through, like EJ dying and Sami leaving—all stuff that happened long before Will slept with Paul and the lies and the schemes and the plotting that followed. In fact Sonny didn’t seem all that upset about being lied to again. I thought that Sonny was done making excuses for Will, but apparently not.

And you knew that when Paul asked Sonny about Sonny’s real feelings for him that Sonny would never answer the question. He hasn’t answered it for months so why not now? The show keeps dragging out that plot point. Speaking of plot points, Sonny still doesn’t know about the blackmail and Paul only threatens to expose Will? What? After all the terrible things Will has done, why is Paul holding back on one of the most awful?

The show has to have Paul not have a duplicitous bone in his body and that makes him seem unrealistic and weak. Clearly, Sonny finding out about the blackmail will be a big plot point and maybe the show will finally turn and have some development for Paul and Sonny’s relationship when Sonny finds out. Or maybe given the wishy-washy, wimpy way Sonny is written again, he’ll probably shrug and make excuses for his POS husband.

Emmerdale (U.K.)

Not much happened last week. Robert went back to Chrissie and Lachlan promptly started blackmailing Robert to get him his laptop back. I assume that Lachlan will have it back sooner rather than later and start targeting a new victim. You know I still remember Lachlan looking up ways to take out David and how to make it look like an accident. The show never went anywhere with it. I wonder if they’ll ever pick up that thread?

On a side note, I wasn’t happy to read that Natalie Anderson, who plays Alicia is leaving the show. She’s been incredible during this sexual assault storyline and turned out to be one of this show’s best talents. I assume given that the show is teasing that several major characters will be dying later this year, she’s doomed. I’d hate to see Alicia go like that, so let’s hope that isn’t the case.

Then again, it would be just like the show to have Lachlan try and kill David, but get Alicia by mistake. Hmm.....

Hollyoaks (U.K.)

John Paul and Ste finally broke up for the reasons they should have used to end it long ago: there is too much drama in them being together and JP was tired of the arguing and fighting and constant turmoil. It made perfect sense, though it also made sense before they got married. But let’s face it, even though we know both of them will move on to new relationships, Ste with Harry and JP with Lockie, it’s obvious neither of those pairings will work out and they’ll get back together.

Not only are both Harry and Lockie unsuitable long term partners for Ste and JP respectively, the show telegraphed their reunion with the whole ‘lets meet under the archway on Christmas Day to see if we’re still in love’ scene. After all, they were married on Christmas Day, lest we forget. So a reunion is inevitable. But JP didn’t waste time taking off his wedding ring, did he?

I loved that bit of banter between John Paul and Theresa when she said she was going to court and he asked ‘accused or witness’ and then when Theresa said she was involved with the Blakes and JP asked if that was wise, Theresa replied ‘When do I do anything wise?’ Hilarious.

So Lindsey and Freddie finally got married after a lot of drama and a few dead bodies along the way, huh? I’ve always thought they were a dreadful couple and neither of them are particularly likeable. I guess the show feels like we should root for them, but to me they’re awful people who don’t deserve the happiness they think they’re entitled to.

And I hate that the show is on the verge of killing off poor Phoebe, clearly the next victim of the show’s serial killer. She was a great character and the actress was pretty good. The show just didn’t know how to use her after the sex slavery storyline, putting her in terrible romances with Vincent, who turned out to be gay and then Robbie, who was a homophobe who abused Phoebe’s brother. So now they just kill her off? Not only does the show bump off another McQueen girl, which seems to be an annual tradition, they give a character who has had nothing but a hard life, a terrible send off. Yuck.

Don’t get me started on how Sinead gave birth to the cleanest baby ever.

Though I hate the over-convoluted storyline, I’m glad Mercedes is back. I loved that scene with her and JP after the breakup. I hope we get more of them together.

Hmm.... I wonder what the big secret about the Lovedays is? Show says it’s very shocking and controversial. Let’s just hope it’s interesting.

Neighbours (Australia)

I think this entire storyline with Ezra trying to revamp the bar and Nate and Sheila scheming to stop their boss from doing whatever he wants with his business is stupid. Maybe I’ve worked in the industry for too long, but I just find this type of thing highly implausible. But at least it’s over thanks to interrelated storylines that wound up with Ezra going to jail. And if this means, after Nate and Sheila’s argument, Nate starts dating again, it’ll mean it was all worth it.

Shortland Street (New Zealand)

Clearly both Alex and Lucy are fooling themselves. Alex and the fact he was with men is why he couldn’t find a happy relationship and Lucy in thinking that Alex can change who he is. It would be different if Alex said he was bisexual, like Nicole, but he says he’s not gay anymore and he’s never been with a woman. That doesn’t bode well for a bright future. The red flags are there, Lucy needs to walk now. But she won’t, otherwise there’d be no story.

As far as Clementine goes, it’s not up to her to decide when and where Alex tells their parents. I get that she’s hurt that Alex didn’t tell her and she had to hear it from someone else, but she doesn’t have the right to dictate to Alex about this. She needs to get over herself. One thing is that I didn’t know that Alex was once in the church. That’s an interesting aspect to the story and it does give insight into who Alex is and why he feels the way he does.

This Week in Spoilers

Hollyoaks: Harry’s secret is in jeopardy when Kyle, out of jail while he awaits trial for attacking Ste, returns to school. Seems he has the CCTV tape of Harry at the gay club and threatens to send the tape to Cleo unless Harry steals some exam answers from Patrick’s office. Harry agrees, but his plan to break into Patrick’s office goes awry. Later, Harry and his friends are going joyriding when they accidentally run over Dylan. Dylan is rushed to the hospital and the kids scramble to cover their tracks.

Harry tries to get the test answers to Kyle, but it’s too late. Kyle has already sent the tape to Cleo. Cleo demands the truth from Harry, who is still determined to save his relationship with Cleo and keep his secret. But how far is he willing to go to do to so?

Shortland Street: Determined to prove to everyone (including himself) that his relationships with men are a thing of the past, Alex decides to have sex with Lucy. But will he be able to go through with it?

Teasers For Next Week

Coronation Street: Todd gleefully confesses to his schemes that have ruined the lives of his family...

Days of Our Lives: A shouting match ensues when Will doesn’t like Sonny’s answers about Sonny's feelings for Paul...

Ben and Paul’s first meeting isn’t exactly romantic...

EastEnders: Ben and Abi have sex, but after Ben meets Paul Coker, everything changes...

Emmerdale: Finn begins to realize the depths of his mother’s duplicity....

Finn catches onto his mother’s schemes. Will he expose her?

Hollyoaks: Sinead schemes to keep John Paul out of Ste’s life for good....

Neighbours: Jared and Kyle help Nate with his love life....

...And Down The Road

Days of Our Lives: Derrick is back! What trouble will he cause this time?

Coronation Street: Todd begins to see the error of his ways....

Neighbours: Nate goes on a first date with Brett, quickly complicated by the arrival of a man from Nate’s past...

That’s it for this edition of Langford On Soaps. Please share your comments below. See you next week!

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