Liveblogging “Days Of Our Lives:” GACK Wrap

Sonny finds horrific evidence of a dark moment in human history. Join us for the fun at 1 PM ET!

Um … my thoughts on “Tom” are definitely more “TV – MA” … with nudity, sexual situations, and strong language. Viewer discretion is … advised.

We revisit Sonny’s Ill-Fated Search For The Blue Bunny. He finds the empty condom wrapper, and Gabi actually asks “Is that … yours?” Oh please, Will and Sonny obviously use Magnum XXX. He tells her “No, it’s not mine, which obviously means it’s yours. You actually had sex with Nick here, in the living room? What if Will and I had walked in?” Well, Nick and Will are already familiar with Gabi’s ladyparts, so why not give Sonny a look?

Sonny tells her “Don’t you realize how messed up this is?” I Love Sexually Shaming Sonny! Meanwhile, Nick is telling Will “I don’t blame you for hating me,” and Will tells him it’s not about hating him, it’s about protecting himself.

Nick tells Will he wants Ari to have a happy life, and he just wants to be a friend, and Will doesn’t have to protect her against him. “I’m just asking for a chance.” Will says “I gave you one. Everyone did, and you blew it. I’m sorry, no one should have to go through what you went through. But no one should have to go through what Sonny and I went through, either.” Caroline walks up and throws her two cents in “Amen to that.” Oh, she’s lucid today. And she’s vestless.

Sonny lets his Snark Flag fly, and says “you can’t get back with Nick!” Gabi tells him “Who says I was?” and Sonny holds up the evidence and snarks “So did you hook up with some other random guy this afternoon? Did ya hook up at Mommy & Me?”

Caroline asks Nick “Does the truth hurt? Good! The good thing about having alzheimers is that I can speak freely, and no one expects me to use tact.” She tears into Nick and herself for introducing him to Gabi, and Nick asks both of them “What do I have to do to prove that I’ve changed?” They tell him they’ll think about it.

Gabi chatters and blathers about all the sacrifices she’s had to make, and how her life hasn’t been the same, and she’s tired of Will and Sonny telling her who she can see. Sonny tells her that if she misses her life with Nick, something is seriously wrong with her. She yadda yaddas about missing cuddling, and spooning, and “Yes, I Miss Sex.” I think I’m going to stick my fingers in my ears for a while.

Gabi keeps yammering and yammering about Sonny not really liking her, and not trusting her. Sonny reminds her “How can I trust you after … you know what.” Gabi is furious that he had the audacity to bring about that little incident with Melanie, and how can can use one little kidnapping against her? She then delivers an admittedly great line “I’m sorry we’re not all as perfect as Saint Sonny. No one is unless they’re sleeping with him!” Ha! She then storms out of the house, because I’m sure someone will take care of the baby.

Will comes home, and tells Sonny that Nick tracked him down and wanted to work things out. Sonny says “I hope you told him to go to hell.” Will says yeah, and tells Sonny that he doesn’t want Nick near Ari unless one of them is present. Sonny holds back from telling Will about the condom.

Meanwhile, GACK have soiled another piece of furniture, and Nick suggests that maybe it’s time to move out of that house, because she does have options now. Gabi says she’ll think about it, and then remembers she has a kid, and starts to leave. Nick tells her ’I’m glad you came.” I think I’ll stick my fingers in my ears for a while.

Gabi comes home, and while Will is with Ari, she delivers an ultimatum to Sonny “If I continue living here, you and Will need to stop telling me who i can see, and what i can and cannot do.”

Nicole tells Marlena “Between the two of us, we can make Kristen’s life Hell. And you know Hell.”

So … Sonny is going to keep the condom a secret from Will. Oh Sonny. Gabi blackmails him into keeping his mouth shut and get along, or she’ll move out, and tell Will it’s because of him. Sonny, you’re smarter than this.

And Nick is scheming again.

That’s it! Thanks for joining me. I don’t know when the guys are on again, but we’ll let you now.

80's Pop Culture Expert, Shooting At The Walls Of Heartache.