Madonna, on a never-ending quest to promote her latest album Rebel Heart, has shaded everyone from Lady Gaga to the state of Michigan with her signature brand of pretentious wit in recent weeks.

Related: Madonna: “Gay Rights Have Advanced Further Than Women’s Rights”

In an Us Weekly interview published Monday, the Queen of Pop directed additional shade at President Obama, Beyonce, and the "two little Japanese girls" who yanked her down a flight of stairs at the Brit Awards last month.

"The person I most want to meet is President Obama," she told the magazine, wondering aloud why she's never been invited to perform at the White House.

"When the heck am I going to meet him? He just needs to invite me to the White House already. He probably thinks I’m too shocking to be there. I’m serious. If I was a little bit more demure…or if I was just married to Jay Z. Hey, if Jay would only take me as his second wife, then I’d score an invitation."

No, Madonna. You'd probably would have already scored an invitation if you hadn't outed the President, Jay-Z and Beyonce as members of the Illuminati — they're not inviting you because you've exposed the New World Order!

The 56-year-old entertainer reveals a number of other gems in the Q&A, including which Madonna song is her all-time favorite ("Bitch, I'm Madonna"), which one she never wants to hear again ("Material Girl"), which celebrity friend she wants to kiss (Drake), and the thing she absolutely hates the most (texting).

Check out the full interview over at Us Weekly.