Margaret Cho Talks Celebrity Outing, Newt Gingrich Claims Religion Being Outlawed

Plus Iron Man 3 dominates, Kate McKinnon does Martha Stewart, and Vince Lombardi protected gay players

E! Online’s Twitter was hacked over the weekend, Justin Biebertelling their followers that Justin Beiber had come out as gay. Twitter shut the account down quickly, avoiding a stock market crash.

A new condom has been developed expressly for receptive anal intercourse. There are demonstration videos where the animation was a bit too graphic for us, but head on over to take a look.

Iron Man 3 had the second biggest opening weekend ever, taking in a whopping $175.3 million domestically, and another $175.9 million overseas, for a total haul of $680 million since it came out. The studio will keep about 55% of that for the first Iron Manthree weeks, meaning the $200 million film is already turning a huge profit for Disney.

Part of that is no doubt due to the marketing campaign. The trailer for Iron Man 3 took home the Golden Trailer Award for Summer Blockbuster, while Disney also picked up the Animation award for Wreck-It Ralph.

The NYPD was outside St. Patrick’s Cathedral to keep out gays planning to attend mass with dirty hands in response to Cardinal Dolan saying “you must first wash your hands.” People were notified that if they attempted to enter the church with dirty hands, they would be arrested for criminal trespass.

Meanwhile, in San Francisco, Cardinal Salvatore Cordileone calls Rhode Island marriage equality an “injustice.” He says “Marriage is the Gabourey Sidibeonly institution that unites a man and a woman to each other and to any child conceived of their union. While those making great sacrifices to raise their children in less than ideal circumstances need and deserve our love and support, we cannot claim to have a just society if we do not look out for the most vulnerable among us: children. That means preserving in the law the principle that every child deserves a mother and father united in marriage. That means supporting in our institutions and in our culture the true and unique meaning of marriage.”

Gabourey Sidibe says she’s dated a gay man. “Who hasn’t dated a gay dude? He didn’t tell me [he was gay], I just sort of figured it out. There were weird things he would say. He once tried on my heels…that was a pretty big indication!”

Barney FrankBarney Frank received the Role Model Award at the Equality Forum in Philadelphia, and had his normal straight talk on the subject. “Let’s be clear. We don’t talk about our sexuality any more than straight people do. The difference is when we talk about sexuality, it’s called ‘coming out.’ When straight people discuss their sexuality it’s called ‘talking.’”

British House of Commons Deputy Speaker Nigel Evans says he’s shocked by his arrest for rape and sexual assault. “Yesterday, I was interviewed by the police concerning two complaints. One of which dates back four years by two people who are well known to each other and who until yesterday I regarded as friends. The complaints are completely false and I can not understand why they have been made, especially as I have continued to socialize with one as recently as last week.”

Multiple players for legendary football coach Vince Lombardi Vince Lombardisay that not only was he aware that some of his players were gay, he went out of his way to make sure that no other players on the team treated it as a problem. His daughter Susan Lombardi says “He was discriminated against as a dark-skinned Italian American when he was younger, when he felt he was passed up for coaching jobs that he deserved. He felt the pain of discrimination, and so he raised his family to accept everybody, no matter what color they were or whatever their sexual orientation was. I think it’s great what Jason Collins did, because it’s going to open a lot of doors for people. Without a doubt my father would’ve embraced him, and would’ve been very proud of him for coming out.”

Margaret ChoMargaret Cho has taken some heat over outing in the past, and she says she’s comforted many closeted celebrities who were afraid. “My history in show business spans over a quarter of a century, and I have seen many people in the industry struggle with coming out, only to find much more success after they finally did. I have comforted many shaking hands worrying at rolled-up tabloids like worry beads, and I’ve borne witness to sorrowful shouts of “But it’s my business! It’s my private life!” I felt for them, but at the same time I didn’t understand, because they didn’t come from where I came from. They didn’t see any of the sickness and the suffering. They didn’t get really good at closing caskets or have that cremation smell permanently embedded in their clothes and hair. They were younger, or they were working on their careers and their wonderful talents, getting more and more successful and happy — then suddenly secure enough to come out. Their lives, as far as I could tell as part-innocent-bystander and part-industry-insider, seemed to improve greatly as a terrible fear was lifted, a terrible fear of themselves.”

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Credibility is everything for a journalist. And it’s suffering in the 24/7 news cycle, because too little fact checking can be done in the race to be first. But even when there’s no race to be first, you can still get it wrong, like Howard Kurtz did with his commentary on Jason Collins not being upfront about having been engaged. It seems to have accelerated his departure from The Daily Beast, and on his CNN show Reliable Sources, Kurtz allowed himself to be grilled by other media watchers as to the impact on his reputation. While it’s obviously an effort at image repair, it’s a brutal way to go about it.

Newt Gingrich is convinced that gay rights activists are trying to outlaw religion. He brings up the old story of Catholic Charities being outlawed in Massachusetts and D.C. for adoption services that the right loves to trot out, saying that conducting their business within Catholic doctrine was outlawed. He’s lying though, even if it’s a lie of omission that he almost (but sadly not quite) get called out on. Of course Catholic Charities could have kept conducting adoption services in those locations – they just couldn’t do it with taxpayer money unless they stopped discriminating. He leaves that part out. The Catholic Church is perfectly free to dip into their nearly unlimited funds to provide adoption services for only heterosexual customers, but they are outlawed from taking public money to discriminate as they should be. Isn’t there some rule in Christianity about lying? Or is the rule lie, then go to confession, be forgiven, then lie again, repeat confession, endlessly? I get so confused.

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Adam Patch’s wife drank a bottle of wine and decided she wanted to tell him a joke. So Adam recorded it, then animated her story. There’s no word on if he’s still married.

Why do humans kiss? Because let’s be honest, it’s kind of weird. When did pressing your lips to other lips become the universal symbol of love and affection? The story may be slightly grosser than you think, and people like Alicia Silverstone may be to blame.

Saturday Night Live was pretty much a bust this week, with Zach Galifinakis not really delivering much as host. But a few skits did manage to shine, but notably without the host. Kate McKinnon played Martha Stewart in a ad that was probably inevitable, and while the subject matter didn’t give Kate much to work with, she somehow managed to make her Martha shine almost as bright as her Ellen.

My favorite recurring sketch is always Fox & Friends, because even if it sucks, the corrections at the end on the sketch always having me pause the DVR to laugh. This week they took on Jason Collins and Mike Bloomberg, and made the actual segment about as funny as the corrections at the end.

Kiss of the Damned is a fresh look at the vampire movie, casting the immortals as decadent theater goers who eschew human blood in favor of human audiences, until one of their own goes rogue. This has a feel much closer to what I feel vampire movies should be that what we’ve been getting lately.

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