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"Misfits" 1.03: Real Friends Help You Move Bodies

When last we left our anti-heroes, they were getting "I Know What You Did" mash notes from a mysterious stalker that suspects them of killing their probation worker. Also, superpowers! Kelly reads minds, Curtis time-travels, Simon turns invisible, Alisha instills horniness through touch, and Nathan... had sex with an old lady.

We open on Alisha having a little too much fun with her sexy-touch superpower at a nightclub. Yikes. Horrifying ethical concerns aside, Alisha, maybe you should, um, pace yourself?

The gang muses over who could have figured out their dirty little secret, and Simon decides to turn invisible so that he can spy on whoever's been leaving them threatening messages. Aw. Poor Simon, alone in the bathroom while the other misfits try on charity clothes and do perplexing Bono impressions.

Kelly has a counseling session with Jodi, the girl she fought with and got saddled with community service as a result. Things quickly escalate and the girls get rough, and suddenly there's a rapidfire montage of... hair follicles? Odd. Oh well!

Elsewhere, Alisha flirts with Curtis and discovers more about his rap sheet; apparently he was buying cocaine with his girlfriend when he got caught. He got community service and the girlfriend got prison. Bummer. But all Alisha seems interested in is the fact that he no longer has a girlfriend. She's pretty obviously interested in Curtis, who's understandably put off by her power and its creepy implications. “I could have you anytime I want,” Alisha teases.

And that time is now, apparently, because she grabs Curtis's wrist and they have sex in the bathroom. Yiiikes. Alisha clearly hasn't figured out the not-exactly-consensual implications of her power, which Curtis angrily makes quite clear to her once he comes to his senses. No one comes out and says the “R” word, but it's most certainly looming overhead.

Alisha is jarred by Curtis's words, and responds by.... having more less-than-consensual sex, this time with Ben, a volunteer at the community center. Yiiiiikes. This subplot could definitely be the springboard for a serious and thoughtful conversation about the politics of sex and gender, but I'm not optimistic about that conversation happening on the Internet. Moving on!

Simon hasn't discovered anything about the gang's mysterious creeper, and he's further disheartened when he turns visible and nobody even seems to have noticed that he's been gone. He shares his woes with his online buddy “Shygirl18,” who is revealed to be... Sally the probation worker! Oh snap!

Oh, and also Simon discovers that a construction crew is digging up the area where the gang buried the bodies, which means that their secret could be exposed at any moment. Whoops.

He interrupts Nathan's “what the heck is my power anyway” experiments to share this news with the others. Kelly is wearing a weird hat for some reason, and Nathan is wearing a bra because he is Nathan.

The gang sneaks off in the dead of night to dig up the bodies, and Nathan accidentally chops off a hand. Whoops. Simon takes this opportunity to swipe Tony’s credit card so that he can place a charge on it later and make it look like Tony’s just skipped town. They stash the bodies in a storage room of the community center, where Nathan playfully pulls off Kelly’s hat, revealing that she’s turned bald. Jeez, Nathan. Maybe quit touching things?

The next day at the community center, Kelly runs into Jodi’s ex-boyfriend, who also seems to have gone bald. You don’t need to read minds to figure out that Jodi appears to have the power to turn people bald. Man, that’s the worst power ever… uh, except for Alisha’s power.

Meanwhile, the misfits formulate a plan about what to do with the bodies: bury them in the same spot, but just before the construction workers pour a concrete foundation. Alisha and Curtis continue their tiff, with Alisha running off with Ben in an effort to make Curtis jealous. In addition to being an obviously terrible idea, this creates a problem because the gang needs her dad’s car to move the bodies. Simon turns invisible and steals the keys to Sally’s car instead. They dump the bodies in Sally’s trunk just in time for her to show up and drive away… with the bodies in her trunk. Awkward!

Alisha and Ben have a genuinely terrifying scene where Ben touches her and inadvertently becomes an attempted rapist. Things don’t get much better when Curtis tries to help and accidentally touches her as well. Thankfully, she manages to get away. Curtis catches up with her; she breaks down and admits that maybe her power’s not so great after all. Uh, ya think? Curtis admits that he has feelings for her, too, and they decide to try dating each other exclusively minus the whole touching thing. Shades of Pushing Daisies.

The next day, Sally arrives in her car and finally notices an unusual smell coming from her trunk. She opens it up and finds… well, you know. Fortunately, Curtis’s rewind power gives the gang another chance, which Nathan uses to distract Sally by throwing a brick at her windshield. “It’s just pure, mindless vandalism!” And it totally works! She chews out Nathan and the rest of the misfits stash the bodies for good under a layer of cement. Oh, Nathan. Once in a while you’re so dumb that you loop back around to smart.

Kelly angrily confronts Jodi, only to discover that she’s just as bald as Kelly. Turns out that Jodi has alopecia, and her power copies the condition over to those she’s especially angry with. Good news is that it’ll wear off after a couple days. Yay! Kelly’s Ponytail of Awesome will rise again.

Everyone celebrates on the rooftop and congratulates Simon on his mad evidence concealment skills, but when he suggests they all go out for a drink, they flake out on him. Aw. Poor invisible Simon.

Are Curtis and Alisha a match made in heaven? Are Sally’s suspicions put to rest? Tune in for the next episode and find out!

Misfits airs on Logo every Thursday at 10/9c. The on-air episodes are edited for U.S. television. Want to see the show in its original version? (More cussing/nudity.) Unexpurgated eps are available for viewing online the following Monday at LogoTV.com!

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