Morning Meme: Mark Wahlberg Concedes To Taylor Lautner, “Eureka” May Live On, And “Final Destination” Visits Bayside High

In what is bound to be the best looking portrayal of Paradise
, Benjamin Walker is set to play Archangel Michael opposite Bradley Benjamin WalkerCooper’s devil.

I’m not out to bash an 18-year-old, but wealthy socialite Kevin Michael Barba made waves when Gawker said he was looking for a publicist to bring the out
teen on to the scene. Matt Rettenmund
sat down to talk with him about what his goals are, but all
I got was that he wants to be a young gay role model, to show that you can be
out and be successful. But the part I don’t get is what he’s successful at –
being born well? Getting invited to charity events? He sounds sincere, yet I
just don’t get it.

In a bit of brilliant branding, Science Channel is tapping
Fringe’s John Noble to host a show about freakish science experiments that
didn’t happen on a sound stage.

I’m yet to try I understand it’s neat, but I
don’t really have the time to devote to another online social experience. But I
may have to make time to try out the fad, since it seems solid enough for Kanye West and Lady Gaga to invest in the hot startup.

MTV has added a new category to the VMAs this year – Best Video With a Message. Competitors
this year are Pink’s “Fu**ing
Perfect,” Lady PinkGaga’s
“Born This Way,” Katy Perry’s
“Firework,” Rihanna/Eminem’s
“Love the Way You Lie,” Rise
“Make It Stop” and Taylor
“Mean.” Five out of six are gay/bullying anthems, so we
may have a shot.

A new $1 chip that fits in your wallet can test you for HIV in 15 minutes flat, and just as
accurately as a laboratory test. It has the potential to revolutionize testing
not only in Africa but even among the scared and timid here in the States.

The American Psychological Association (that’s the real one,
with the doctors) has come out unanimously in favor of marriage equality.

Phineas & Ferb is one of the truly creative cartoons (heck,
show of any kind) on television. They’ve also been great about guest stars,
Phineas and Ferbincluding Clay Aiken and Jane Lynch. So tonight they air their
first Disney Channel Original Movie, Phineas & Ferb Across the Second
. I can’t wait to see how the creators scaled it up to movie
form. I also had no idea that it took 13 years to go from concept to air.

Are single people, gay or straight (but especially gays in
marriage equality states) being turned into second class citizens? I’ll be honest, it
certainly feels like it.

Lily Tomlin is
joining NCIS as McGee’s
grandmother, but it turns out her character isn’t just about baking cookies and knitting.

Mitt Romney, Michele Bachmann, and Rick Santorum immediately signed onto NOM’s
anti-gay pledge that includes championing a federal amendment against gay
marriage and establishing a presidential commission to investigate
anti-Christian actions by mean ol’ gays.

News that Eureka was ending might be a bit premature, at least according to the people
who run Syfy, who dare to contradict TVLine.

Paul McCartney
says he’ll be speaking with British police concerning the News
hacking scandal, as he too was a victim.

SupermanAs I shop for a new car, with a Subaru as a top choice and a
technology loaded Ford Focus Platinum as another, I’m disturbed that hackers have managed to open and start a Subaru Outback
with only their smartphones.

Has the new Superman
suit that Henry Cavill is sporting ditched the red underwear on the outside? And what does
that do for bulge control?

Chris Colfer has purchased a really ugly house on Laurel Canyon for a
cool $860,000. SomebodyGaultier spanks Lady Gaga call HGTV and tell them to send over their best gays
for a makeover.

The CW will kick off their fall season with a special starring Lady Gaga and Jean-Paul
. I’ll be honest, the idea kind of scares me.

The Princeton Review has released their annual list of top
colleges, including which are the most GLBT friendly, and which are the least.
Unsurprisingly, NYU tops the list of the best places to be gay at college.

Brett Ratner is the unlikely producer for next year’s Oscar telecast.
Some of Ratner’s more recent work includes X-Men: The Last Stand, Skyline,
and Horrible

Taylor LautnerCats are the reason we can’t achieve peace in Afghanistan, at least that’s what
I got from this story from the Washington Post.

At the Hollywood Foreign Press luncheon, Mark Wahlberg, seated with Leonardo
and Taylor Lautner
remarked ” I am sitting at a table with a gentleman who is better looking
than you and is in better shape than me. So, we’re both out of a job, dude.
Taylor Lautner! We’re screwed. It’s over, dude. Titanic and Boogie
were a long time ago. I accept it. I had a good run and on to
the next.”

BD Wong is traipsing around the streets of New York City dressed like this, and he may be attracting some attention. He tweeted the photo with “um, people R starin a lot & droppin sh*t all over the place wtf? #IThinkMyCutoffsR2Short #GottaLuvNYSummer” I’d also like to point out that Trendy Gay Hipster told me I shouldn’t wear Jorts.

I don’t think they’re quite short enough.

So this is actually a meat tenderizer sold by Williams-Sonoma. What did you think it was?

Don’t look at me like that!

I do not know how old this image is, where it came from, if it’s been altered, or anything else. But it’s perfect.

There must be a lot of Jensen in Dean.

Tom Lenk is in Edinburgh for the FringeFest, and says he spent the day at Pleasance, which I believe to be a theater. You should go see his show, you may end up in his documentary.

He has the best hair. It’s almost alive.

A dingo ate my baby! What – it’s just a baby dingo? False alarm!

While we do love Pauley Perrette around here, I have to admit that this picture would be improved just by removing her.

Well, we might have to get Johnny Galecki a ladder.


In the history of great things the Internet has produced, we remember things like Sneezing Baby Panda or Dramatic Chipmunk. But they now bask in the shadow of New Romance, the viral video made by Final Destination 5 star Miles Fisher to promote the film. Bayside will never be the same again.


Which is very different than this 8-bit Saved By the Bell interactive game trailer.


Patton Oswalt is going to revolutionize Broadway, if he can just get a word in edgewise between phone calls.


Don’t Hug Me I’m Scared is either an ode to creativity, or a warning. Why can’t it be both?


I had completely forgotten that Jason Bateman was in Teen Wolf 2. He probably wishes we all forgot about it. But he does try to redeem himself with Jimmy Fallon, who again can’t keep from cracking up during a bit.


I do enjoy a good time lapse video. And Los Angeles has a strange beauty about it at night.


I’m not entirely sure I’ve ever seen a trailer more violent than Killer Elite with Jason Statham kicking the crud out of normal alpha dog Clive Owens.


Speaking of extreme trailers, here’s The Sitter with Jonah Hill, back before he lost the weight. I have to say, NSFW doesn’t even begin to describe this. It’s just so far over the line it has to be seen to be believed. Is this supposed to be funny? Just remember, this is extremely NSFW.


Just where did the modern hipster come from? Who were his ancestors?


Blink-182 did something very cool. They partnered with AT&T to find instances of their music being used in an unauthorized fashion by fans. And they didn’t sue. In fact, they took the videos and turned them into an impromptu “music festival” for the launch of their first new single in eight years, “Up All Night.”


Brotherhood TV is six African-American and Hispanic gay men who talk about issues in their lives in a series of programs. Rod 2.0 has a good primer. In this episode, it’s all about dating and relationships.


On Monday, HBO will premiere the documentary Superheroes about, well, real life superheroes. And I had completely missed that one was out and proud, and fighting homophobia and gay bashers. More to come, but the trailer is amazing.



Opinionated. You'll love to hate me