Morning Meme: Ryan Steele Will Do Anything For “Likes,” Avoiding Homophobia, and Cee Lo Green Says “All I Need Is Love”

In housekeeping news, snicks would like to beg your forgiveness for not having a Briefs yesterday, Dolly Partonbut he was overwhelmed by the liveblog of Liz & Dick. He’ll be making it up to you today with a liveblog for Days of Our Lives.

In a new interview, Dolly Parton denies that she’s in a secret lesbian relationship with her childhood friend Judy Ogle. But she loves her gay fans, and talks about entering a drag contest as Dolly Parton at a gay bar, and also about the threats she’s received from the KKK for Gay Days at Dollywood, the amusement park she owns. “When it first started there were people giving us threats, I still get threats. But like I said, I’m in business. I just don’t feel like I have to explain myself. I love everybody.”

An Alabama woman was beaten by the 18 year old brother of her lesbian partner over the holidays, and now it’s come to light that it’s not the first time, as he had hit her over the head with a pipe wrench in the past. Police say they have no reason to believe this is a hate crime, beyond all the evidence.

Tank CarderCleveland Browns linebacker Tank Carder called a fan a faggot on Twitter, then issued a non-apology after catching some heat. Outsports notes that other sports leagues have been quick to fine or suspend players over similar actions, but so far, the Browns and the NFL have remained silent.

A third accuser has come forth in the Kevin Clash scandal that rocked Sesame Street, and this one claims that he met Clash on a gay chat line at the age of 16. He’s been writing a book about the incident, and pages will be presented by his attorney in court.

The U.S. State Department has met with representatives of Uganda about their pending “kill the gays” bill and has advised them to “look very carefully” at what they’re doing. Britain has already threatened to cut aid to the nation over the legislation.

SpaceX founder and billionaire Elon Musk has announced plans to form a colony of 80,000 people on Mars in his lifetime, with the average cost of the trip targeted at $500,000, or about the cost of a new home. He envisions a one-way trip with rockets that don’t return, and inflatable habitat domes. Musk has previously said he intends to finish his own life living on Mars.

It’s official! Ben Savage and Danielle Fishel are returning as Cory and Topanga for Disney’s Boy Meets World Sequel, Ben Savage and Danielle Fishelwhich will focus on their 13 year old daughter.

At least one person enjoyed Lindsay Lohan as Elizabeth Taylor in Liz & Dick, with Lady Gaga tweeting the embattled star “@lindsaylohan you did a beautiful job on ‘Liz & Dick.’ ’Let no one bring u down, Liz didnt, they always try to knock the greats down a few pegs.”

The latest additions to the AP Style Book (you can probably tell I let my subscription lapse) says that you should avoid using the word “phobia” in stories, especially relating to politics or beliefs, such as Islamaphobia or homophobia. Which reminds me of the Reykjavic Mayor Jón Gnarr who reminded us that homophobes aren’t afraid of anything, they’re just assholes. So I assume that the AP wants journalists to just call them assholes? I’m fine with that.

I’m a little fuzzy on the math, but evidently there’s a loophole that would allow a warp drive to be built, assuming you can come up with the energy, and it doesn’t violate general relativity. Space-time is evidently capable of being moved around a ship under the right conditions, cutting down a trip of a few light years to just two weeks. NASA is actually exploring the idea.

Manolith tackles the question of guys and their pubes, and if you should let it grow wild, shave it bald, or just do some maintenance down there. The general consensus seems to be that you need to trim, and probably shave your balls. I used to have a friend back in my party days who pronounced from his shower as we were getting ready to go out one night “It is every gay man’s solemn duty to shave his Merlinballs.”

Turkey is going to add being gay to murder as one of the few reasons to be discharged from the military.

It’s a sad day for Merthur fans, as it has been announced that Merlin will end after the fifth season. The producers say it’s time, with the finale providing the epic battle for Camelot. Ideas for spinoffs are being explored, but it’s hard to imagine the chemistry of the series working without all the players.


 I’ve spent a lot of time noting how well Blake Jenner fills out shirts on Glee, but thanks to Dalton blazers, I may have shortchanged Nolan Funk, who is hoisting Christmas ornaments with his hefty shoulders.

He managed to decorate his tree before me, and I thought I was early

 The poster for “The Snowmen,” the Doctor Who Christmas special

 Kevin McHale must be considering a revival of Equus

 Justin Hartley appears intrigued

 Out super director Bryan Singer is in New Zealand for the premiere of The Hobbit


 From, well, everywhere yesterday is the video for Hot Chips “Don’t Deny You Heart,” in which an on field rivalry for soccer players takes a decidedly friendly turn, proving that lust and loathing are separated by a very fine line indeed.


Ryan Steele and Amy Goodmurphy present Likes, which takes on those people who are so desperate for you to appreciate them on Facebook they post shirtless photographs of themselves and call it a “work in progress.” If Ryan Steele is a work in progress, I’m quitting the gym, because I’m already so far behind in this game that I may as well give up. NSFW.


Improv Everywhere decided to have their folks camp outside of a 99 Cent Store for Black Friday and then storm the place, like they were getting great doorbuster buys. It’s an interesting concept, and I can feel for the shop owner. Back at another retailer I managed, we never really did Black Friday. Then iPods happened, and we advertised them with free accessories while supplies lasted. I walked up to my store at 6AM and found people sleeping on the sidewalk, Being southern California, I just assumed they were homeless and stepped over them, not realizing they were customers who had slept outside my store all night for $30 in iPod accessories.


Disney is working on robots that can throw things at you. The real purpose is to make them  interactive, but let’s face it, once they can target you with a ball, how long until a knife or a M-16 follow?


Cee Lo Green crashes the Muppet Christmas party in the video for “All I Need Is Love.” There’s something charming about The Muppets at Christmas, and so much of their personality is allowed to shine, from Fozzy’s jokes to Miss Piggy’s love of fancy cars.


Angus T. Jones, who has been on Two and a Half Men since he was a child, and reportedly makes $350,000/episode, has decided to bite the hand that feeds him. Having found religion after some problems with alcohol and drugs, he’s now born again, and wants you to quit watching his show, which he thinks is ungodly filth. Now far be it from me to stop anyone from discouraging viewing of Two and a Half Men, because it’s just awful, but the sheer arrogance of this young man to stab an employer in the back like this after it has made him insanely rich really bothers me. Why don’t you donate your entire income from all the years of the show to charities that fulfill a godly mission of feeding the needy, and then we’ll see if you feel so high and mighty? It’s likely that he has a non-disparagement clause in his contract, but most people think it’s unlikely to be exercised because nobody wants to harm the third highest rated show on television. Still, stop watching Two and a Half Men. Not because it’s ungodly filth, but just because it’s awful.


Fortress of Attitude says they came out to their car one day to a note calling them, their car, and their parking job gay. So they did what any sane person would do, and turned it into a rock song starring men clad in Speedos and the Fagbug, because obviously someone out there needs to be shown what a truly gay car looks like.


Daniel Radcliffe sat down with ET Canada to talk about Horns, his new supernatural thriller. Sadly, he wasn’t wearing his horns for the interview, but he does discuss how people in the movie perceive the horns on his head, and it’s actually quite clever, because that was an elephant in the room I hadn’t figured out yet.


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