Mr. Wolfe (Rex Lee) is the man with the mic in the Chatswin High cafeteria. Tater tot anyone?

Ever since the new ABC sitcom Suburgatory premiered last fall, the character of Mr. Wolfe (played with much bravado by Rex Lee) has made the gaydar of viewers spike into the 'WAY GAY' category. But until last night's episode, entitled "Out In The Burbs," we didn't truly know what the guidance counselor's story was.

Last night, Mr. Wolfe boldly grabbed a microphone in the middle of the school cafeteria and valiantly announced that he was gay.

AfterElton.com is the only news outlet to score an exclusive first chat with the newly out Mr. Wolfe. (Okay, maybe with a little help from the writing staff of Suburgatory!) Here he shares his feelings on his new life on the on the other side of the closet.

AfterElton.com: First of all, congratulations on your coming out. First Kristy McNichol, now you. How do you feel?

Mr. Wolfe: I was shocked! Shocked to my core! Little Buddy, the adorable tomboy from Family? Kristy McNichol, who lived with a woman for the last twenty years? Gay?! Just proves, you never really know a celebrity, do you?

AE: I can imagine one plus from coming out in a cafeteria is there are tater tots nearby. What are the minuses?

Mr. Wolfe: No tater tots on the Chatswin High menu! We’re more your typical boeuf bourguignon, mango chutney trout, Moroccan lamb type of school cafeteria. But our cafeteria does have excellent acoustics. Every time I step up to the mic I feel like Liza at Carnegie Hall! (pause) Is that too clichéd?

AE: You speak some good street in the episode with the undercover narc. Is that all from The Wire or personal experience on the tough streets of Indiana?

Mr. Wolfe: Thanks, Corner Boy. I can tell you it’s all from my own personal experience of watching The Wire when I was “carrying weight” at my folks' house in Indiana. Just keeping it real.

Mr. Wolfe is the guidance counselor at Chatswin High who knows of the 'homosexual highway.'

AE: Tessa’s gaydar needs a little adjusting. How would you go about fixing broken gaydar?

Mr. Wolfe: I just adore Tessa, don’t you? She’s like a breath of fresh city air blowing in from Manhattan. And I can’t really criticize somebody else’s gaydar since I just got burned by this Kristy McNichol shocker.

AE: You mention buying the boxed set of Perfect Strangers. What other classic TV DVDs are in your collection?

Mr. Wolfe: Twin Peaks for Sherilyn Fenn and Lara Flynn Boyle, Gimme A Break for the theme song, Small Wonder for the incredibly talented Tiffany Brissette, and Walker, Texas Ranger for obvious reasons.

AE: Tessa speaks of the ‘homosexual highway?’ Do you know where that is? Sounds like a fun road trip.

Mr. Wolfe: I think, as humans, we’re all travelers on the “homosexual highway.” As far as my journey is concerned, I’m super excited because I’ve reached the onramp. I’m currently accelerating to try to match the speed of traffic, and once I find a sufficiently large gap, I’ll be merging. I’ll be merging onto the homosexual highway.

AE: Your GF Heidi is hot. Will she take this news hard?

Mr. Wolfe: Honestly, I think she’ll be devastated. We’ve been planning a trip to Ixtapa and now that’s probably not going to happen. I hope I’m not too late to get a refund on those tickets. You’re not free the last week of June are you?

Does Mr. Wolfe see the Drag Queen quality in Chatswin Queen Bee Dalia (Carly Chaiken)?

AE: Dalia has something of a drag queen quality about her. Do you agree?

Mr. Wolfe: You mean, in the sense that she’s beautiful and fabulous and an over-the-top ideal of femininity? No. She’s all those things but definitely not drag queen like. The Kardashian girl gets that a lot too but I think it's because she's over 5'9. People think anyone over 5'9 is a drag queen.

AE: Do you think George has ever had a gay BFF? I think it could be a match made in heaven.

Mr. Wolfe: I’m not sure… When I first meet Noah, I thought, “Well groomed, handsome, tan? There’s no way this guy can be straight.” But then I found out that he’s definitely straight. I prefer not to talk about how I discovered that. What was the question?

AE: I’m also an Indiana native. Do you prefer Midwest-type guys or more the Park Avenue variety?

Mr. Wolfe: I prefer Alexander Skarsgård. Which category would he fit into? Nordic Midwest?

AE: Do you like the older dudes like George Clooney, maybe Taye Diggs, or is Taylor Lautner more your speed?

Mr. Wolfe: As a high school guidance counselor, I think Taylor Lautner is a bit young for me to be into. But he is super hot and I am into him. And George Clooney is old enough to be friends with my father. Which is also hot. And Taye Diggs is… Well, Taye Diggs. Which one is Taye Diggs? If he's the one I think he is then yes on him too.

AE: Will we see you date on upcoming episodes of the show?

Mr. Wolfe: What show? I’m just living my life and keeping it real.

AE: What is the most played song on your Ipod?

Mr. Wolfe: Robyn’s “Dancing On My Own.” She basically describes the last two years of my life in that song. Adele’s “Someone Like You." Don’t ask. I’ve just been dealing with some things lately. "More Than Words” by Extreme. Because it’s just as relevant now as it was then, and "Rack City"-- mostly because I like the whispering part in the beginning.

If you missed last night's episode, go to the ABC website. Also, check out my TCA/ABC recap later this week for my chat with series creator Emily Kapnek. She spills details on what's next for Mr. Wolfe!

Suburgatory airs Wednesdays at 8:30/7:30c on ABC.