Yesterday on The Colbert Report, Stephen Colbert introduced Texas Republican Louie Gohmert as the guy who says the things “no one has the slightest desire to say.”
One of those things is Gohmert’s archaic views on gays in the military— and believe us when we say that they’re archaic.
Gohmert, the House Republican in Texas’ 1st district, went on a Christian talk-radio show and waxed on his knowledge of ancient Greek history:
Hey you know there’s nothing wrong with gays in the military, look at the Greeks. They did have people come along who they loved that was the same sex and would give them massages before they went into battle.
But you know what it’s a different kind of fighting, it’s a different kind of war, and if you’re sitting around getting massages all day getting ready to go into a big planned battle then you’re not going to last very long.
You know, all those Athenians did was give each other some gay massages before spearing their enemy in the face. That was definitely what The Iliad was about.