If there’s a moral to the story, or a lesson to be learned from last night’s episode of Supernatural, it’s that humanity isn’t so bad after all! How’d I figure that? Well, Castiel seems to be acclimating, heck, even enjoying it, and unless I’m misreading that last shot we got of Crowley, he’s chasing after his humanity too.
But let’s not get ahead of ourselves – before we get there we have a very hot special angel to deal with.
We start off with some good news. Kevin has managed to translate the angel tablet! Of course, he’s translated it into a dead language that scholars have attempted to decipher for centuries with no luck but hey, it’s still progress. The collective light bulb goes off, though, and the boys decide to ask Crowley for help, figuring he might recognize the “doodles.” They’re right, he does. But as with everything Crowley does, translation comes at a price.
Meanwhile, Castiel, now going by the name of Steve, has found himself a job as a sales associate at a convenience store and by the look of things, he’s shooting for employee of the year. At least his manager seems to think so (and I agree), but all’s not well when he hears about people disappearing in his town and something about it just smells Supernatural to him. What does he do? He calls Dean who, of course, uses that and his guilt over having kicked Castiel out of the bunker; to ditch the mountains of research Sam and Kevin are going to be buried under.
Shortly after Dean arrives and has a look at the first crime scene, he realizes these disappearances are more like evaporations (literally) of depressed and sad people, and he calls to inform Sam back at the bunker. Sam, being the good brother he is, wants to leap into action and be there with Dean but what he doesn’t realize is that Dean is balancing on a very small rope, with having to keep Sam safe so he and Zeke can heal, as well as keep Zeke away from Castiel and the other angels. Not to mention, neither Cas nor Sam can find out Ezekiel still exists in the body of Sam Winchester. Talk about drama!
After a “bummed out” teen girl becomes the latest victim of the grossest vaporization process this side of evaporated milk, Dean grabs Cas from his “normal” life and back into his “hunter-in-training” boots for help. Cas agrees, even though Dean has been doing nothing but judging his new life since he arrived, and even though he’s got himself a date with his lovely single-mom manager later on that evening. It’s a good thing Dean brought Castiel along though, because it turns out Cas has seen this before in Heaven. It looks like the work of a special battalion of angels called “The Hands of Mercy,” and their work in heaven was to heal or provide a merciful death to those on the battlefield who were beyond help. Seems like someone has continued their work here on earth but the range of human emotions is clouding their judgment as to who needs to be put down.
The misguided but gorgeous Ephram (just one man’s opinion) is played by Ashton Holmes, who makes that cross earing on his left ear look good instead of giving me immediate flashbacks to a time in the 90s where everyone thought those were cool. Or maybe it’s hideous but I was too busy staring at his beautiful face and licking my lips. Anyway, Ephram is the angel responsible for these mercy killings and it turns out he has his sights set on Castiel. Uh oh. (I’m telling you guys, if this show were on HBO, it’d be a hell of a lot more… um… interesting)
Meanwhile back in the bunker, Sam and Kevin have recruited Crowley but the former king of hell wants to make a call before he offers up the goods, and that, of course, requires some pure blood… like the blood of a prophet. Kevin’s not exactly thrilled but he’s family and he obliges. Crowley finally gets through to Abbadon and they have a quick chat about how she’s running things now, collecting the souls on his deal early, and basically burning his house to the ground. Crowley is less than amused, but as the Winchester’s bitch (Abbadon’s words, not mine) all he can do at the moment is promise her that she will burn, to which she replies that she can’t wait.
Now the time has come for Cas to go on his date and Dean is there to coach him and drop him off… even telling him how many buttons to undo. “Okay that’s enough, Tony Manero,” Dean says in reference to John Travolta’s character from Saturday Night Fever and now I can’t stop picturing Castiel dancing disco. As it turns out, Castiel’s manager wasn’t expecting his for a date at all but instead to babysit her baby while she went on a date with Ephram! Aw! Anyone out there volunteer to help Cas babysit? Make-out privileges on the couch included. Any takers?
A disappointed Castiel serenades the baby with the theme song to “Greatest American Hero” and it’s just about the most precious thing I’ve ever seen, until Ephram crashes the party looking to end Castiel’s pain. Actually, Cas’ pain is how he found him in the first place, despite the angel warding. Looks like the unfortunately fully clothed angel has Cas just where he wants him (not to be confused with where I want him), when Dean barges in just in time to get an angel blade into Castiel’s hands. That means Ephram’s a goner and we’ll never get to see the homoerotic subtext between he and Castiel build… or the mentor/mentee relationship, or the friends with benefits agreement, or the… okay, I’ll stop.
Back at the bunker, Crowley has kept up his end of the bargain and translated the “doodles” for Kevin and Sam but the news isn’t good. In fact, the news is that this new world order is irreversible and the fallen angels are here to stay, thanks to Metatron. This is Supernatural, though, so nothing is irreversible. (I’m hoping that applies to Ephram’s death… leave me alone with my delusions!) Sam communicates this back to Dean who chooses to keep it from Castiel, instead insisting he keep living his normal life and leave the angel problems to he and Sam. Dean’s a good friend, even if his dating advice includes telling Cas that his dates end when the singles run out. (And now I’m picturing Dean in a rap video, “making it rain.” I apologize… my imagination can’t be tamed!)
In what has to be one of the more foretelling scenes in the episodes, Sam goes in search of the missing syringe with Kevin’s blood only to find that Crowley is injecting it into himself. Why? Is he trying to recapture that bit of humanity he showed Sam in that church last season? Is he addicted like Sam was with demon blood? I don’t have the answer but I can’t wait to find out. Sam might be right after all… there might still be a part of Crowley that’s not a douche.