Unfortunately, it’s the characters on TV and in movies we’re watching who get to enjoy these moments, not us.

No, we sit at our keyboards grinding out articles like this one, merely writing about some of the most romantic moments in the history of gay entertainment.

*Sigh*

Still, who knows? Maybe by the end of this article, my partner Michael (who is also the editor of this site) will come crashing through the door of my dreary downstairs office, pulling me away from computer like Richard Gere pulls Debra Winger away from that boring factory machine at the end of An Officer and a Gentlemen, kissing me passionately, then sweeping me up into his uniform-clad arms in order to carry me out into the bright sunlight — all to the strains of "Up Where We Belong" sung by Joe Cocker and Jennifer Warnes.

Hey, a guy can dream, can’t he?

In the meantime, let’s look at some of those romantic moments in gay entertainment, shall we?

“Kish” Make Love on One Life to Live

Cheesy, candle-lit love-making has been a mainstay of American daytime drama since the early 1950s, when the TV genre first appeared.

It just never involved us ‘mos.

But all that changed in December of 2009 when One Life to Live’s Officer Fish and Kyle, or “Kish” as the duo became known, went somewhere daytime drama had never gone before: the two of them had cheesy soap opera sex, complete with fireworks exploding outside the window.

Hey, they even spooned after! I was verklempt – weren’t you?

Sam and Frodo in The Lord of the Rings

"Kiss him, you fool!"

Here's a confession: I generally hate "slash" and "hoyay." I'll take my gay characters gay, thank you very much, and I actually get vaguely annoyed when people are convinced they see gay subtext where it obviously wasn't intended to be.

That said? I think one of the most romantic same-sex pairings of the last ten years doesn’t involve gay characters at all. In the three Lord of the Rings movies, Samwise Gamgee and Frodo Baggins share a bond that goes beyond friendship: Sam and Frodo are soulmates, joined together like, well, a ring, where you're not quite sure where one's spirit ends and the other's begins.

And while they may both be straight males (although we don't really know about Frodo, do we?), their characters completely lack one characteristic that just might be relatively common in straight men: competition. Except when infected by the evil of The One Ring, Sam and Frodo work together.

And they die together too. "I'm glad to be with you, Samwise Gamgee, here at the end of all things," Frodo tells Sam when it seems that all hope is lost. I first saw this movie with a group of my straight guy friends, but I was still blubbering like a mad fool, and Sam and Frodo's love was the reason why.

Next Page! A very beautiful thing!

Stephen Gately Sings to Another Man in Boyzone's "Better"

It was touching when Boyzone decided to include some same-sex imagery involving their out lead singer Stephen Gately in their video for their 2008 single "Better" — the first major boyband to do so. But the song and the video have taken on new poignancy since the premature death of Gately in 2009.

Sometimes love means loss. And this Valentine's Day, it's worth remembering that for one man, Gately's partner Andrew Cowles, it won't be getting better at all.

Jamie and Ste Dancing at the End of Beautiful Thing

You know how you can tell if you're in immediate need of a heart

transplant? If you're not completely choked up at the end of the 1996 UK

movie Beautiful Thing when Jamie and Ste declare their love to each other and the world by dancing to Mama Cass' "Dream a Little

Dream" in the courtyard of their "council flat."

Seriously. If this scene doesn't move you to tears of joy and hope, you obviously have no heart whatsoever, so get to a hospital pronto.

"The Kiss" in Brokeback Mountain

For all the endless ink and pixels spilled over the 2005 movie Brokeback Mountain, for me, the story all comes down to one heartrending moment: when, after four years apart trying to make it work leading heterosexual lives, Jack and Ennis finally see each other again, and they share a secret but insanely passionate kiss — a kiss which Ennis' wife Alma accidentally witnesses.

People talked and joked more about the infamous "tent" scene, but this is the movie's true heart: Jack and Ennis need each other in a way that transcends everything else, even as they're also planting the seeds of their own tragedy by not openly embracing that need.

But there's more to this romantic kiss than just the story in the film. By 2005, gay movie-goers had been treated to the occasional gay character in major Hollywood films, but we had very rarely seen moments of unbridled passion — much less even kissing. In this one powerful scene, Hollywood gave us something vital — something that, like Ennis, many of didn't even know we desperately needed.

Next Page! Where no man has gone before!

Wade Holds Noah's Hand on Noah's Arc

Kisses are often romantic, of course. But sometimes romance can be as simple as one man

holding another's hand — something Wade does for Noah after Noah is gay-bashed, in the "Baby, Can I Hold You?" episode of the second season of Noah's Arc. Wade isn't even Noah's boyfriend at the time — they've broken up. But that changes by the end of the episode, because romance is ultimately about realizing what's truly important.

Torchwood's "Captain Jack Harkness" Episode

In gay entertainment, Torchwood is a huge deal for a lot of reasons. The UK series put the world on notice that it was truly going somewhere where no man (or science fiction show) had ever gone before with its 2007 episode "Captain Jack Harkness." Captain Jack goes back in time to 1941 where he meets the man whose name he later adopts — a man Captain Jack knows is destined to die the very next day.

But the two men fall in love, carrying on a brief, but passionate affair that culminates in a nightclub scene where they shock 1940s sensibilities (but also tug at the heartstrings of at least one knowing woman) with a tender dance. Suddenly, Captain Jack is called back to the present, leaving his namesake to his inevitable doom. The captain knows he has no choice but to leave — but before he does, he returns to give his lover one last passionate and incredibly romantic kiss. Spock and Captain Kirk don't know what they're missing.

Kevin and Scotty's Second Kiss on Brothers & Sisters

Back in 2006, in the fifth episode of the first season of Brothers & Sisters, Kevin and Scotty shared their first kiss — and true to form, Kevin was all neurotic about it, because it had taken place in a public restaurant.

You know the old adage about it being better the second time? That was true for Kevin and Scotty when they shared a second kiss in the same episode, much more passionate this time, standing in the doorway to Kevin's apartment — with the neighbors watching to boot.

Next Page! Will Michael rescue Brent from the dreariness of writing this article?

The Video for the Cowboy Junkie's 1998 song "Miles From Our Home"

You want to talk about daring? In 1998, the Canadian alt country band

The Cowboy Junkies chose to turn the video of their song "Miles From Our

Home" into the story of a native teenage boy on a roadtrip with the Asian male

friend he's secretly in love with.

In 1998!

Very, very far ahead of its time — and incredibly romantic.

Astral Sex in Shadow Walkers

Okay, I admit this last one is totally self-serving, but I have a new gay teen novel, Shadow Walkers, just out last week, and there's a (hopefully) very romantic scene that totally fits here that I'm really excited about, but that no one has yet asked me about.

In the book, two teens are doing astral projection and they're being stalked in the astral dimension by a mysterious being, even as they seem to have come to a dead-end in their search for one of their brothers who has been kidnapped. In frustration, they soar high into space, as far away as possible from the evil being who lives in the shadows down below. There, in the astral dimension, suspended in the heavens between the moon and the Earth, they have a moment of spiritual bonding that can only be described as, well, astral sex. (Is this a first in a teen novel? I would say so!)

Well, I've come to the end of my article, and my partner Michael never came to rescue me from the factory-like drudgery of writing it. I'm still stuck in my office grinding out romantic Valentine's Day content for AfterElton.com readers who probably all have their own roses and chocolates and crackling fireplaces to enjoy with their boyfriends and girlfriends.

*double sigh*

Wait a minute. Why do I have to wait for him? Who's to say that I can't be Richard Gere and go rescue him as Debra Winger from the drudgery of editing my romantic Valentine's Day article?

I'll do it! Hey, I'll even take a picture:

"Love lifts us up where we belong!"

Michael and I are going to have the best, most romantic Valentine's Day of all time!

(Although I'm not crazy about the fact he's wearing a dress. Who knew that's how he edits this website? Best to get him out of that as soon as possible — which is actually something of a "win-win" for me!)

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY, FOLKS!

Now go do something incredibly sweet for the man or woman you love.