The suspense is killing us: Friday's release date of Magic Mike can't come soon enough. I want to wail at male celebrity ass in the company of scandalized housewives and hopeful gay dudes right now. Until then, we'll have to settle for revisiting the career of Magic Mike star Channing Tatum and agreeing on his hottest moments. There are some naughty, naughty pictures of him out there, and we've tried to include the most work-palatable items only. So let's do this.

10. Channing establishes his Casanovan comeliness in Dear John

Our preferred Amanda Seyfried vehicles of choice may be Mean Girls and Jennifer's Body, but Dear John provides a fine slice of damp Channing, and that means the AFI should hold commemorative festivals in its honor. Hard to pick a definitive Nicholas Sparks hottie among Ryan Gosling, Zac Efron, and Tatum, but he's a major contender.

9. Channing channels Patrick Swayze, has the Time Of His Life

I'm a sucker for a funny guy, and Tatum's fully committed imitation of Patrick Swayze in this Dirty Dancing send-up is pretty priceless. And the wig is righteously ugly. Charlyne Yi, your efforts were noble, but Tatum steals the scene using Johnny Bravo swagger.

8. Or do you a prefer a tattooed Tatum? Please thank Battle in Seattle.

Battle in Seattle may have been a box office bomb, but it dealt us a heretofore unseen treasure: Channing's ability to pull off gigantic tattoos. I like how the flames point at all the things I'm already looking at.

7. Oh yeah, almost forgot: He can dance.

I can't deny that the Step Up movies are entertaining, and I'm particularly entranced by Mr. Tatum's trampoline pummeling dance massacre in Step Up 2 the Streets. Coordination! Yes! Actual non-pornographic sexiness! Hoorah! Feels good to give props to the movie that gave us Missy Elliott's modern classic "Ching a Ling."

6. G.I. Joe: The Rise of the Cobra g.i.fts us with Channing in dogtags

Military hotness suits Mr. Tatum, a man whose chest seems incomplete without a chain and a couple of tags wagging on it. Props to Marlon Wayans for holding his own in this very beefcakey shot.

5. Shirtlessness shields you from the hilariously bad plot of The Vow

Poor, amnesiac Rachel McAdams. In The Vow, she can't remember the love of her life, and that's a shame, because he's this person. Once you ignore the movie's attempts to spew wisdom ("Moments of impact [e.g. a brain-desroying car accident] help in finding who we are!"), you get down to slobbering at Tatum's naked, tantalizing torso. Oh, and his ass, if you have time.

4. Street Fighting Man!

Fighting is Channing Tatum at his gruffest: a fist-throwing, dead-eyed pugilist with a taut body and humorless stare. Love seeming him conjure some nerve. They can't all be Nicholas Sparks movies that look like the Britney Spears "Sometimes" video, you know.

3. Let's combine all underwear shots into one item, shall we?

I think we've done good work here. Thank you, Tony Duran!

2. Yes! The REAL stripping Channing!

Face it, when that video of a young Channing Tatum stripping in Florida for a gaggle of caterwauling ladies hit the web, you were panicked in disbelief. You were throttled with hotness, scandalized by the insane footage, and so, so excited. Honestly, the g-string heat would be embarrassing for some people, but on Mr. Tatum it just seems delectable. Lime green is his color, fer sure.

1. The naked Magic Mike bathroom saunter

Magic Mike is a critically regarded film about working naked dudes and their many woes. And while its nudity is pretty damn safe, it's still enough to make you burst into applause when it happens. I'm sure you hyperventilated when the trailer premiered and Mr. Tatum's threateningly photogenic ass made its first appearance. Here's an emotionally gripping GIF of the glutes at work.

We win. Here's some extra nudity if you need it. What are your favorite moments of Channing Tatum hotness? Would you have included moments from Stop-Loss or A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints?