Weekend Meme: Ryan Lochte Wants To Be “The Bachelor,” Dolly Parton Loves Her Gay Fans, and a New Look At “The New Normal”

The big news of the day was of course Mitt Romney picking Rep. Paul Ryan as his running mate. Matthew MitchamRyan is known for his budget plan that would give huge tax breaks to millionaires while gutting Medicare and privatizing Social Security, but he also has a 0% from the Human Rights Campaign on gay issues. He does have great hair though.

Sadly, Matthew Mitcham didn’t make it to the finals for the 10M platform dive, but he’s already won gold in hearts around the world. Plus that gold he picked up in Beijing.

In a recent interview, Dolly Parton talked about her gay fans. “Being a freak, I know what it’s like not being accepted. Not that they were freaks but I was. I just know, through the years, I’ve had people tell me I should do this or I shouldn’t do that. I have a lot of gay fans because they know that I just accept people as they are. That’s not my place to judge. I ain’t God and I ain’t runnin’ for office. But I was proud.”

Bradley Manning’s lawyers have filed a motion that his confinement has violated Article 13 of the UCMJ which states “no person, while being held for trial, may be subjected to punishment or penalty other than arrest or confinement upon the charges pending against him, nor shall the arrest or confinement imposed upon him be any more rigorous than the circumstances required to insure his presence.” Jeremy RennerManning’s treatment under confinement has been called “cruel and inhuman” by the United Nations’ special rapporteur on torture.

NBC has ordered a pilot for a period drama about Cleopatra that sounds big and lush. But who should play the title role?

Jeremy Renner’s The Bourne Legacy is set to take the box office crown from The Dark Knight Rises, pulling in $41 million. The Dark Knight Rises will slip to third, with $20 million to The Campaign’s $29 million.

The feds are probing Jerry Sandusky’s life for connections to possible child pornography, along with solicitation of minors across state lines.

Have you ever tried to read the Terms of Service for a website? Are you a lawyer? I’m pretty sure that iTunes owns my house if I buy one more album from their “exercise” genre. A new site is determined to turn all that legalese into simple icons, and they’ve already processed the big sites, like Google, Twitter and Facebook.

The Young and the Restless’ Greg Rikaart has a great essay up connecting the Chick-Fil-A controversy to causes that he cares about and works with, like GLSEN.

Salon talks with adult film star Devon Hunter about his newly launched Anteros Media, which sets out to produce “ethical porn.” While the content is gay, nearly 55% of their subscribers are women. They also avoid using gay-for-pay performers.  “We’re working under the very specific notion that the best fantasies are inspired by reality. I find it difficult to access the videos that go to great lengths to construct these impossible scenarios. I don’t connect with them personally. I find also that I’m having more trouble connecting to porn if I can’t see the guys’ faces. There’s no connection to the people. It’s so anonymous. They’re a bunch of shark attack victims, they have no heads!”Victorious

Not only is this a picture of Mark Zuckerberg without his trademark hoodie, but also without a shirt at all. In case you ever wondered.

Nickelodeon has canceled Victorious, which stars ally Avan Jogia and Victoria Justice. Creator Dan Schneider doesn’t sound happy about the decision.

On Friday, Army Reserve officer Tammy Smith was promoted to the rank of Brigadier General, becoming the highest ranking out service member. Her stars were pinned on by her wife, as is tradition. She remains modest about the significance. “I don’t think I need to be focused on that. What is relevant is upholding Army values and the responsibility this carries.”

One Million Moms is upset with Ragu about that commercial where the kid walks in on his parents having sex. For once, it’s nice that it’s not a gay thing that OMM is targeting. Now excuse me while I go buy some mediocre sauce.

If you’re in New York City this week, consider seeing Right On Target at the New York International Fringe Festival. It’s by a friend of mine, and it’s a bipartisan, biracial romantic comedy between an African-American conservative and his liberal Jewish wife. Somehow, she also manages to have a lesbian relationship. The play opened tonight, but also runs August 15, 18, 22, and 24 at the Cherry Lane Theater on Commerce Ryan LochteStreet.

Madonna is looking at a $17,000 fine for promotion of homosexuality in her concert in St. Petersburg, Russia this week. Granted, she can probably find that between the couch cushions, but still.

Ryan Lochte says that he’s definitely looking at doing Dancing With the Stars or The Bachelor. Personally, if he wasn’t madly in love with Lachlan, I’d rather see a season of The Bachelor with Matthew Mitcham.

It looks like the third installment of Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure is a real thing. Keanu Reeves and Alex Winter are on board and Galaxy Quest’s Dean Parisot is directing a script from the original writers. Excellent!

 This is Alec Mapa and his family attending Mary Poppins in Los Angeles. Can you imagine a more wholesome family?

 This expression never made any sense, unless they expected you to climb out on a ledge and jump

 Colton Haynes, presented without comment

 Jonathan D. Lovitz loves chest and abs day, as do we. Seriously, that was Friday at the gym for me

 Even when they’re young, they’re stalking me

 Jayson Blaire’s wardrobe for The New Normal is interesting

 And that’s a wrap for Weeds!


 During the Olympics Friday night, if you were up late watching BMX, they showed an extended preview of The New Normal from Ryan Murphy. I have to say, despite some of the cliche jokes, I’m impressed. They don’t shy away from the gay aspect of the show, and we even get a sweet scene of Justin Bartha and Andrew Rannells in bed together, though there’s no sign of Jayson Blaire in his tighty whities.


Brett Avery brings us a lovely animated video for his song celebrating marriage equality, though considering how it’s presented, I feel like just calling it “marriage.”


We have another preview of Stephen Amell in Arrow, and we’re once again treated to angst and his insane workout routine. Thankfully this one has less blood than some of the early previews.

When NASA isn’t busy sending a nuclear powered rover to Mars, they like to relax by playing with yo-yos in zero gravity, which is much more interesting to watch than one would think, since I never got any joy from watching my neighbor with a yo-yo unless he was going to give me a turn, which he never did.


I’m going to be upfront and admit that I’m not thrilled with the first minute or so of this video, because the albacore tuna fishing seems needlessly brutal to me. But once it gets to the surprise that the GoPro camera found under the boat, it’s breathtaking.


When the North Koreans invade the Pacific Northwest, it’s up to Chris Hemsworth as a Marine on leave to save the country with a rag tag band of high school students that includes Josh Hutcherson in this Red Dawn remake. And what is that mystery weapon that allowed the invasion to succeed?


Charlie Berens is back with a new edition of Headlines That Suck, looking adorable as ever as he pokes fun at Olympics headlines, Hooters, and more. But he better record one at the beach before summer is over.

Pat Robertson is upset that the gays are mad at a chicken sandwich and thinks that until we can birth a baby out of that part of the body we’re so obsessed with, we should just shut up. Honestly, Pat, I think I spend a lot less time thinking about that part of the anatomy in a given day than you do. Except during the Olympics, when David Boudia is on the television. Then I have a one track mind.


Via Towleroad comes this incredibly beautiful video of gays protesting the anti-propaganda law in St. Petersburg. You really just need to soak in the imagery and the bravery on display.


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