What Should I Do If My Brother Is Gay?
This week's Reddit gem comes from an anonymous 17-year-old boy, who discovered his 12-year-old brother may be gay after rifling through his iPhone without permission:
Im 17 and my little brother is 12yrs old and is currently in middle school. He has always been shy and slightly socially awkward, but lately it has gotten much worse. He has dropped all of his hobbies and now plays video games every chance he gets. Because of this he dosen't have very many friends and has gained a considerable amount of weight. I am worried that he wont grow out of this phase anytime soon if at all. I started wondering if he had any friends so one day I looked through his text messages on his iphone. He only had like six contancts including me and our parents. I found a kid his age from school who he was talking too and it shocked me. My little brother was trying to convince the kid to "sext" him and the kid kept responding "no thats gay lol". He then later sent the kid a link to a porn site. Is my little brother actually gay? could that be the reason he is becoming so disconnected from the rest of our family? could it just be a phase? and most importantly, should I talk to him about it?
The 17-year-old, who posted his thoughts with a temporary throwaway account in April, describes his younger brother exhibiting all the classic symptoms of depression (withdrawing from social settings, dropping friends, losing interest in hobbies).
Overlooking these, he then assumes what's 'wrong' with his brother is not depression, it's that he must be gay.
"Could it be a phase?" he asks. "Should I talk to him about it?"
A sane commenter responds:
If he is gay and depressed this is probably a really difficult time for him and if you were to say anything to him it should be 100% supportive and non-confrontational, dealing with these issues at such a young age is stressful enough. Since you're posting here I assume you only want the best for him, so my advice is to just be there for him and keep an eye on him.
What is your advice?
