LANGFORDS PICKS AND PANS

Days of Our Lives (U.S.)

I’m sorry, in the real world, a guy who looks like Derrick would not have to try so hard to get laid. Nope, nope.

I’m actually annoyed by Sonny’s being all jealous and pouty about Derrick and Paul. He had his chance, plenty of them to get with Paul, and he chose to stay with his loser husband.

I want to see Paul move on -- and not with someone looking for marriage and babies. It would be nice to see two gay guys date and just have fun and romances and dramas that aren’t about kids or a wedding. And what’s with Sonny spying on them in the bushes? He just happened to be walking through a dark park with a baby? Creeper.

So if the point of this double date (beyond pushing Derrick and Paul together) was for Will and Sonny to hang out with gay people, why did they go to a straight club instead of the gay bars in Salem we’ve heard about (but never seen)?

When did Paul start calling John ‘Dad’? Did I miss a scene? I would think that would have been a special moment in their relationship.

Justin and Kate are so gonna screw.

I think Ben is a total bore, but his arms looked amazing in that tight shirt he had on in the park when talking with Will.

THANKS TO PINKYSWEAR FOR THE CLIPS!

Doctors (U.K.)

I remember when this show used to have gay characters as regulars, but I don’t think there’s been one since Simon was on years ago. And given that Sean is not a doctor or tied to the medical profession he won’t be around long I’m going to guess, even if he told his sister he wasn’t going anywhere.

I have to say though that I certainly didn’t get that Sean was gay from what he said at the restaurant. Yes, we knew he was gay from his flirting with the cute waiter, but to me what he actually said wouldn’t lead you to think that. Or maybe I’m as clueless as Niamh. Anyway, it’s an interesting story so far and I’m glad that Sean being gay wasn’t a big deal for Niamh and the avoided that drama.

EastEnders (U.K.)

OMG. Those teeny, tiny and revealing briefs on Paul. No wonder Ben keeps going back for more. But already Paul wants more than just sex. I still don’t understand why Paul is involved in a closeted relationship. It doesn’t make much sense, especially given his antipathy towards his grandfather for Les' alleged affair.

That was a pretty intense scene with Ben and Jay. I know they’re supposed to think of each other as brothers, even though biologically they are not, but since Ben was recast there was always this kinda hot, but inappropriate chemistry between them. I know the show would never go there with them, but it would be interesting if they did, if only to see Phil’s head explode.

Speaking of which, that was a terrific scene with Ben and Phil, some really good acting. I still don’t believe Phil would ever turn Ben in like that, but it has created for some nice drama and conflict. Interesting that Ben says he and Jay are leaving in three months, which tells me a lot is going to happen between then and now. I’m going to guess that just as Ben is ready to leave, his believed dead mom will show up very much alive and everything will change.

Given how Abi is prone to violence and her general instability, I have no doubt she won’t react well when she finds out about Ben and Paul. She’ll be the scary definition of the crazy ex-girlfriend.

So I guess Ian is going to let Max go down for Lucy’s death. No surprise since he was willing to let Ben pay for it. We know the actor playing Max is taking a year off of the show, so I guess that means that the truth won’t come out for at least that long. I can’t remember the last time a storyline ran so long. Soap used to have plots that ran for years back in the day, but they just don’t seem to write them like that anymore, at least US soaps anyway. As long as the story remains interesting, as this one has, I don’t mind it at all.

The show chose a strange (and sloppy) way to write Lola out of the show. And Ben didn’t seem to care that he might never see his daughter again, not that he paid any attention to the child when she was around. But you know, I’m okay with that. Not everyone wants to be a parent.

You know, even if Paul had absolute proof of Claudette and Les’ affair, I still don’t think it was his place to tell Pam. I generally believe telling the truth (or what you think is the truth), is more about your own issues than the other people involved. Besides, I still wonder if Les and Claudette are actually having an affair or if there’s something else going on.

THANKS TO WINTERHYMN FOR THE CLIPS!

Emmerdale (U.K.)

There Lachlan is. It’s been awhile since we’ve seen the little creep. And he’s as weird as ever. His plan seems kind of reckless, messing with his grandfather’s meds just to frame Robert. I have the feeling his plan won’t turn out like he hopes it will.

Ross is punching and mugging someone again, this time Robert. Seems like it’s a weekly thing with him. How convenient that there just happened to be a roadblock so Ross could do the job. Or are we to believe that was staged by him? And the casual homophobia is not a good look. Hard to believe I used to really like his character. Furthermore, I know the show is pimping his affair with Debbie as some grand love story, but the problem is that they have no chemistry and given that they are both unlikeable characters, there’s no reason to actually root for them.

Poor Finn. All he does is stand around and listen to his brother’s romantic problems. Given that he has no life and no story, I have a feeling he’s not going to survive next week’s disaster storyline.

I had a real problem with Moira going after Chrissie after she found out about the kiss. Shouldn’t she be going after, say her husband? On the other hand, I liked Chas and Chrissie bonding and becoming friends.

THANKS TO AARON FAN FOR THE CLIPS!

Neighbours (Australia)

Not much to say about last week’s shows as Aaron and Nate mostly were in supporting roles to everybody else’s storyline. I guess the appearance of the Brennan brothers father Russell is going to create some drama given that there are issues between Aaron and Russell about Aaron coming out, but the real story seems to be between Russell and Tyler, who seems terrified of his father. Hmmm....

So Aaron is still teasing Nate about Josh? That’s gonna get old real quick.

Shortland Street (New Zealand)

Edwin and Jack are totally awkward and super cute together. I thought it was adorable how Jack tried to keep his composure after Edwin kissed him. That whole thing with Edwin and his father didn’t make much sense though. Seemed like Edwin was kind of unclear and hazy about what happened between them or what the actual conflict was. I did find Mo’s reaction to be all too realistic though.

I’ve felt he’s never truly accepted Jack being gay, especially given his repeatedly allowing Curtis to be openly homophobic towards Jack. And he did seem uneasy talking to Jack about his feelings for Edwin. But his feelings really came to the surface when he saw Jack and Edwin in each others arms. Now, I do think that Jack might have over-reacted a bit, but there’s no doubt that Mo is still dealing with having a gay son.

However, it's obvious that Mo wants to accept it and be there for his Jack, but he is just having his own struggles. And as much as we might like him to accept it with open arms, Mo’s reaction is probably more true to life. I think Mo will probably come around sooner rather than later. And let’s hope that means putting an end to any and all of Curtis’ remarks.

As for the storyline with Alex, Clem and Lucy, that whole drama seemed to come out of nowhere and I certainly never expected to end like it did. I’ve never cared much for Clem, but let’s hope her diagnosis isn’t as grim as the show made it out to be. I found Curtis’ involvement in the story to be surprising. I have the feeling Curtis and Lucy might be hooking up in the near future.

THIS WEEK IN SPOILERS

Doctors - Nimah is uneasy when Sean flirts with Daniel, one of the firm’s married doctors and she’s shocked to see Daniel slipping Sean his phone number. Sean teases his sister about it and then assures her that he was just going to do some painting for Daniel and that’s what the phone number exchange was about. Nimah isn’t sure she appreciates Sean’s naughty behavior, but even Daniel thinks it’s funny. Later in the week, Sean and Nimah go out for a night on the town. Both of them find unexpected romance, but things don’t go well for either of them.

EastEnders - Paul instantly regrets telling his grandmother Pam his suspicions about Les having an affair with Claudette and tries convince Pam it was a mistake. Pam admits that she has her own suspicions about Les and Claudette. Later, Paul has a candid conversation with Les. Is Les going to tell him what really is going on?

Emmerdale - Life in the village will never be the same when exploding cars and a helicopter crash put several lives in peril. It begins when Lachlan’s plan to tamper with his grandfather’s medication goes awry and Robert finds out what Lachlan has done. Robert being Robert, he uses it to blackmail Chrissie. Enraged, Chrissie confronts Robert at the scrapyard and sets his car on fire. The car explodes, sending debris flying through the air and smacking into a passing helicopter. The helicopter plunges towards the hall where Debbie and Pete are celebrating their wedding, with much of the village in attendance. Who will live and who will die? The show is promising several deaths. Just let my Finn survive, please?

Neighbours - Things remain cool between Aaron and his father and the tension thickens when Russell sees that Aaron is a stripper for a living. Later, Russell runs into Nate and they get to talking. Nate doesn’t reveal he knows Aaron and Russell goes onto talk about Aaron, admitting that he hasn’t known what to say or how to relate to Aaron since finding him with a guy years ago. When Nate sees Aaron, he encourages Aaron to talk to his father, but Aaron gets angry and tells Nate to butt out of his family business.

Shortland Street - Jack is angry with his father’s obvious uneasiness about his growing relationship with Edwin and Mo has to admit he hasn’t quite gotten on board with having a gay son. The conflict, however, only serves to draw Edwin and Jack closer. With Margaret's advice though, Mo comes around around he and Jack make peace. Mo agrees to let Edwin stay another night while Edwin works things out with his dad. But when it looks like Edwin plans on moving in permanently, Jack begins to feel uneasy at how quickly his first relationship is developing and even moreso when Edwin begins to pressure Jack to have sex.

TEASERS FOR NEXT WEEK

Days Of Our Lives - Will and Paul clash -- again; Sonny faces the reality about his marriage...

Doctors - Sean meets a new guy, but Niamh thinks her brother’s new beau is up to no good...

EastEnders - Paul loses his job at the salon, forcing him to make changes about his future...

Hollyoaks - Harry and Ste get closer...

Neighbours - Nate bonds with Ben; Aaron struggles to forgive his father....

River City - Will and Robbie face the truth about their marriage....

That’s it for this edition of Langford On Soaps. See you next week. Please leave your comments and thoughts below.